Welcome Comrades to the 47th edition of the Dispatch
It's been a while since our last issue, but as always things continue to happen in the world of CC. There's been some interesting developments in the C&A as new guidelines have been brought into play to tackle some of the issues brought up recently among the community. More about the specifics with regards to Point-dumping can be found here. The Special Events team continues to entertain us with it's ongoing celebrations as voting proceeds on the Easter Egg Design Contest! with some quality submissions. And of course the 4th edition of the marathon encounters between Mods and Community continues amid intense viewing in the Whac-A-Mod IV. Even the dispatch itself has had changes aplenty as [player]laughingcavalier[/player] takes a break after a long stint as Clan Executive (leaving me with some rather large shoes to fill ), and we've been privileged to bolster the team a bit with some further additions to the Clan and Freestyle teams. Even [player]Victor Sullivan[/player] is experimenting with some intriguing concepts that you can see in our foundry section
[player]Leehar[/player] - Newsletter Executive
If you would like to apply to join the news team, please visit the thread below for more details!
Whac! Whac! Whac! I hope everyone had a good weekend whacking mods, keep an eye out for the final score as many casual games are still running. This edition we have an interrogation of laughingcavalier and a special random game analysis from DoomYoshi as he looks at the battle royale! As you can see we now have numerous people working on the scum insider so all you mafiaheads can look forward to an expanding section in future editions
[player]Nagerous[/player] - Freestyle Executive
The Scum Insiderby nagerous, Fircoal and safariguy5
[spoiler=Interrogation of laughingcavalier]Q. Hey there laughingcavalier! Greetz
Q. How are you enjoying being a monkey? It's great being a monkey. Our clan is one big happy quarrelsome family with some awesome players. Best bit is when there is a big challenge on and suddenly all the monkis appear out of the trees, banging their chests and calling for games, like fierce old grizzly bears emerging from hibernation.
Q. What is the best thing about running the clan section? The best bit is when all the clannies arrive in the newsletter thread, arguing about this and that or saying they enjoyed the paper.
Q. What's your favorite memory of being the clan executive/clan team editor? I think late one night when we were putting the issue to bed and Dai_atan appeared with this awesome set of clan logos he had made up, all layered & finessed & showing the essence of the clans. I've got no design skills whatsoever and it is really great to see the creativity that goes into a powerful design concept beautifully executed - there's so much visual creativity on CC with the sigs and the maps and all.
Q. Why is your cavalier laughing? Well, there's a painting by Frans Hals, but my cavaliers are much more the Prince Rupert variety from the English Civil War. Prince Rupert with his long-flowing black hair would lead his Royalist cavalry into action, they would smash the Parliamentary cavalry to pieces, the battle would be all but won… And then the cavaliers would charge off to plunder the Parliamentarians’ baggage train, leaving their infantry to be rounded up by the Parliamentary infantry… battle lost. …. Mind you, if I’d thought I would be here longer than a couple of evenings I would have tried harder with my username. And made it shorter to type.
Q. If I (Victor Sullivan) was standing right in front of you with no cops around, what would you do?
Call the cops?
Q. If you played blitz on a map and settings of your choosing, do you think you would win? I have a 100% record against reigning Conquerors. That it is a record of 100% defeats is easily explained. Against Scott-land I had something in my eye. Both times. I was a cook when King_Herpes farmed me on City Mogul (hmmm the game record shows I was playing with my regular partner on one of my favourite maps… Herpes must have broken into the gamelog to cover his tracks). Rabbiton and partner had kidnapped a small fluffy kitten and were threatening to torture it if I did not let them win. (Gosh, they seem to have wiped this out of the gamechat too!). To the Conqueror who offered me, err, access to his grandmother if I threw the game, this does not apply to you. Thanks mate - just tell me when you want a rematch. I am confident I could do as well against Blitz as against any of the others. Actually I’d like to see Blitz back. He tarnished his own reputation with his account sitting abuse and he should serve his time. But I’m appalled by the gang who have been looking for something to hang Blitz with for so many years. It’s just sad that some of the most eloquent and funniest people on CC have chosen to devote so much time and effort to trashing him.
Q. Is Sam02 actually your siamese twin? LOL... I thought I had got this crook in my neck from looking up to him.
Q. Does anyone besides sam call you "elsie"? It was Itchy (Iccinot Nabrus) who called me Elsie when we were playing with Kinky & Bones. lc – elsie: geddit? I wish everyone would call me Elsie. It’s as much fun as cross-dressing but you never have to wipe foundation off the pillow.
Q. What are your top 3 favorite---and not so favorable---memories of your time on Conquer Club? TOP: Just three? Well most of our favourite memories here are private and individual, and mostly about epic wins on our journey to conquer the world. Wins your opponents did not expect from you where your genius strategy destroyed them utterly. There are the no spoils games you play for months feeling ever-growing frustration, getting more and more wrapped up in, till finally the pieces fall into space and you make your final push for victory – Game 4266012 . And there are escalating games with the dramatic crash and clash; position, cash, charge, cash & charge again – Game 4088347. A few of our favourite moments are public. I love the laugh I get out of forum posts. One of the top contenders, because I so didn’t expect it as I opened the thread – http://www.conquerclub.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=58&t=122025&hilit=Emmdizzle#p2685693. BOTTOM: Don’t remember.
Q. Do you ever dream about CC? If so, describe your dreams in detail, please. Late night, deeply dark, stormy. It’s raining. Big puddles on the pavement by the chainlink fence, and at the crossroads. We are in the city, but there’s little streetlight. We are walking back, Itchy, Kinky and I from our night out. “Let’s go to mine,” says Itchy.
There’s a group of young men looking threatening across the road. “Watch out for them, they may be dangerous,” says Itchy. He and Kinky speed up. I’m so tired, so out of it, but I follow. One of the men comes toward us across the road, calling out to us. Under a bridge, away from the man, but I lose Kinky and Itchy, I can’t keep up. They’ll be going to Itchy’s digs on the other side of the river. I know the rough direction, but I’ll never find it in this strange US city.
But right here across the road is Itchy’s actual house where we were staying earlier this week. Much better. I go in, through the little kitchen, past the bedroom. Itchy’s place is a bunglow, pretty low-rent. In the living room: the wall opposite is glass opening onto the pitch black, lit by low wattage ceiling bulb, a mess of chairs down the right hand side of the room, in the far left corner a large cathode ray tube TV on a brown draftsman’s chest. It’s a messy room, half-eaten meals and toy soldiers spread across the floor.
I sit on Itchy’s bed. A single bed which projects into the centre of the room, its head against the left-hand wall. I find Itchy’s stash: a roll of sterling banknotes. Nice enough stash but I hope it’s not his life-savings. I flick through it and replace it in its intricate hiding place jammed between the headboard and the wall.
On the wall, a creamy white wall, at waist height a long series of names is etched. Each name is set deep in the wall, in an oblong recess, the name etched in bold, in red. Each name has a number by it. This is the sequence of Itchy’s victories. Number 92, fairly early in the sequence, is by Itchy’s headboard. It begins speaking to me, in a woman’s voice. A man’s voice, her dubs partner, is calling too. “Is that Itchy? Itchy are you there? Are you up for a game?” The voices are coming from outside now, they are probably the gang we saw outside before, but they are not a threat any more, just looking for Itchy, want to play. I don’t answer: I like it here on my own…
A short while later I wake in Itchy’s bed. OMG. My plane home goes today. I’ll miss it. Gotta find my stuff. Gotta pack. Gotta find Itchy. I am totally stoned, completely out of it. I was wrecked when I went to bed and that was only a few hours ago, everything’s spinning, time is spread out sloooowww. I struggle up. The room is a total mess. Shit. It’s my mess. My conference ended Friday and I’ve been hanging out with the guys till now which is Sunday morning. I’ve made all this mess and totally lost track of time and what I needed to get done. I’ve no time to tidy and catch my plane, but I can’t leave Itchy’s place in this state. I look outside: it’s still dark. I’ll have time to tidy and catch my plane. Relief. I won’t get to see the guys before I go though. Never mind, the floor is covered in toy soldiers, they look a lot like mine from when I was a kid, someone has half got a game going, an attack toward the foot of the bed. I’ve got time to play with these while I tidy.
… I wake up in my bed this time, at home. It was interesting at Itchy’s I think, should be here at home though…
I am in Itchy’s front room again, but not alone. Kinky’s here. He’s sat in a cane chair by the window, chatting, the toy soldiers at his feet. I’m looking up at him. He’s almost human, but not quite. He’s more than human, super-powered. He’s very gray, gray skin, larger than human size, dressed in a gray suit. He’s old, very, very, very old. As he talks, his eyes turn on me, his head moving robotically. He is telling me stuff, wise stuff that humans don’t usually know. Actually stuff so wise I don’t really understand it.
…I wake in my bed at home again… It’s still the middle of the night… My daughter’s singing in the next door room….
Q. Have you been successful in recruiting any family or friends to play on CC? Or have they resisted your temptation? I did persuade my brother once. I guess he figured he had more chance of talking to me here than of me actually replying to my phonecalls. @) He managed one game. Well, half a game. I had to keep texting to tell him to take his move. It takes dedication to be a CC addict.
Q. If you were to post your World 2.1 conversations into a novel, how many pages would it be? LOL. Quite a few. But we’re quiet in our trips & quads, it’s dubs where we do the real chatting. We’re getting better. Sam & I used to take 20 minutes to decide on a fort…
Q. What is your favorite colour? Pink.
Q. Are you a wizard? It would be wrong of me to deny it. Most CC addicts, especially the high ranks, have massive egos and very little self-knowledge. I on the other hand am self-effacing and just magic.
Q. Why the move from the clan section leader of the newsletter? CC is a great place. It’s just got one problem. It’s full of these young guys packed full of testosterone who come online into a place where they show no inhibition and can behave appallingly. Team CC exists to bring manners, socialisation and civilization to those young men. We at the soft end of Team CC have enormous respect for the mods & the C&A team who do the hardest part of the job. But we entertainers play our part too, showing by shining example and through harmless fun how CC players everywhere may spread the joy. We do a great job. Our only failure, the only player beyond redemption was [player]Army of God[/player], but since Andy made [player]Saxitoxin[/player] a secret mod, charged only with taking AoG under his wing and leading him to a better place, we may even win there… It is not an easy task socializing hordes of would-be conquerors, it takes great dedication and perseverance, and I realized I have just done all I can with the clans, they are as civilized as they possibly can be through the power of my persuasion. So I have moved on to try my hand in a new arena with the community at large.
Q. As someone who follows clans closely (former Clan Section Exec) Which war do you think has the biggest "wow" factor? KORT over THOTA or TFFS over ID?? With the benefit of hindsight both these victories are entirely predictable. THOTA have been worried about their unbeaten record for a while, fearing luck is as likely to undo them as much as skill. And in the games I’ve played against some of the KORT gang lately they are as hard to beat as anyone on CC. Imperial Dragoons are a clan who have been around a long while and have a habit of bouncing back from dramatic losses with dramatic wins. I’ve played some of the TFFS guys in tourneys and they are tough teams. I think maybe their victory is more important than KORT’s in a way. It’s symbolic of the glut of new clans who have arrived with excellent players, smart organization and great futures. We have got some great competition ahead of us in the clan world.
Q. If you had to leave your wife, would you marry me (sam02)? Nope. I might let you drive my campervan.
Q. Do you thinks its random.org or odds calculator that is totally wrong? Actually it is lackattack’s aunty. The one who knits the dice. She has got her yellow wool mixed up with her white wool and we are all done for.
Q. Would you like to create a giant CC games with real people instead of troops? See dream.
Q. Do you have family troubles because you spend too much time on this site? LOL, I can’t say CC is popular chez moi. But since my wife discovered mumsnet I have had a bit of a let-off.
Q. Would you bring a CC mate you never saw in the reality home? Yes. First I would tell them to pretend they are my workmate so my wife didn’t harangue them.
Q.Do you like monkeys? ( not the clan players, but the real ones) Some of my best friends are monkeys.
Q.Is there any game that you will never forget? (for your own reasons) Oh great. Another chance to talk about my victories. There was the one where I came from 1 territory/3 armies to steal the game - Game 5134301.
Q.Do you laugh a lot ? I did wake myself up laughing the other night. I’d been dreaming I was playing a massive game of football with 100s of people and I’d hidden the ball in a tent.
Q. What are you looking forward to in your new position? We’ve already had whac-a-mod. That was pretty darn good.
Q. Who are your phunky phresh homies, if you had to pick three? Three is not enough – monkis, AoD, Dispatch, forumites, teammates….
Q. If you had to measure the awesomeness of clans using one of the following attributes, which would you use? Popularity/Drama, Win Percentage, Attitude, Percentage of blackjesusness Like everyone I get wrapped up in the drama when there’s a good fight, whatever sort. But I get pretty tired of the clans who just keep on worrying an old bone when it’s been chewed over too long. I really admire the clans who have awesome players and awesome records. There’s an awful lot of clans I like but I think most of all I like the ones who go quietly about the business of winning, just so long as they give us something to laugh about or “ooooo” about every now and again.
Q. Do you think Gold Knight is a sexy blonde? Honey, I just know she is.
Q. Do you prefer cars or bikes? Which one you have? <Insert picture of my mountain bike here>
Q. Do you believe that you are sexy enough to get a woman such as Eva Mendes ? I had to stop seeing Eva. Kate Moss got jealous.
Q. Are you sexy enough to get skillful? The Greek Stallion? Never.
Q. Outside of Conquer Club what are your favourite activities? Probably reading bedtime stories to my children.
Q. What is the best book you've ever read? Again too many… as we are on Conquer Club I can admit to reading military history, and one of my favourites there is Defeat into Victory by General Slim, his gripping account of how he led the British to victory in Burma in World War 2.
Q. Conquer Man or Conquer 4? Conquer 4
Q. WWII Ardennes or WWII Gazala? Ardennes.
Q. How many days/hours could you go without Conquer Club without suffering withdrawal symptoms? About half an hour probably.
Q. Thanks for your time laughingcavalier![/spoiler]
Hi again amigos and welcome to your favorite part of the Newsletter, "War Games", where you can find information about CC Tournaments. In this edition, [player]Dukasaur[/player] has brought the best interview ever in the history of the Newsletter, an interview with me .
[player]Angola[/player] is bringing us a new TPA Update, and [player]Dukasaur[/player] is covering the Join this? or Not! because of real life health issues for our friend [player]Soldierboy[/player]. We wish you the best and hope you get well soon.
And last, but not least, [player]Sonicsteve[/player] talks about one of the most impressive achievements in CC: The 200th tournament win by [player]HighlanderAttack[/player].
[player]jricart[/player] Tournament Executive
Meet the Tournament Winners!by [player]Dukasaur[/player] [spoiler=jricart interview][player]jricart[/player] is someone who loves every aspect of CC. His enthusiasm for the site is obvious every time I talk to him. He runs tournaments, he runs our section of the newsletter, he's one of the small handful of foreign-language mods, and he's involved in a dozen other roles both large and small. But above all, he genuinely loves to play the game, and he plays it well.
On March 19th jricart won Shoop's Digging For Treasures tournament which began on Jan. 22nd. I was able to have a nice conversation about it with him.
jricart, I notice that you've won the Shoop's Digging For Treasures tournament. Would you be interested in answering some questions for the CC Dispatch?
Of course! I love answering questions for the CC Dispatch!
Sounds good! So what attracted you to this particular tournament?
The first thing that attracted me about that particular tournament was the organizer: Shoop76. He is a well recognized TO and somebody that I personally respect. The second thing that attracted me was the tournament setting: 1vs1, my favorite setup. The third thing: the Map! I love Treasure of Galapagos. Very nice! Okay, let's take these points one at a time. I'll come back to the first point, but let's start with the second. What is it you like about 1v1? (I have to ask, because so many people say that they love it, and I for one do not, lol.) In fact, Map Rank says you would be a General if you played only 1v1, so you're obviously very good at that style of game. What do you think makes you better at 1v1 than multiplayer?
Its funny that you mention my MapRank results. I just ran them about two days ago and yes, I would be General as you mentioned if I decided to play only that. In 1vs1, I depend on my own style of play only, my own luck with the dice, and my own mistakes. On multiplayer games, you have to deal with unexpected moves that other players make. I'm a pretty consistent high rank player. I always stay at Major for long periods of time, and that's a bad factor for me in multiplayer games: "They love to target the person with the highest rank to gain more points". Usually, you see alliances against high-rankers. Players often don't play for the overall fun of the games, but just for the points.
If I join tournaments or casual multiplayer games, I tend to do so more readily if they have point restrictions, like in the 2000+ Callout games, or Tournaments for Major+ only like "HA's Major+ Tourneys" by HighlanderAttack.
Well spoken -- a lot of interesting points there. You've expressed what a lot of players say about the reason they play 1v1, but I think the way you expressed it is probably the closest to hitting the nail on the head that I've seen.
The points conundrum is certainly a problem too. A major playing a private has to win 3 games out of 4 just to break even, and that's not easy in a game with so many random elements. I give you full credit for managing to keep your swords, playing in as many tournaments as you do! Interesting that today is the beginning of Whack-A-Mod. Are you expecting to get hit hard?
To be honest with you, I expect to hit hard! I'm lined up with great team members on dubs, trips and quads. And as you can imagine, I will play a bunch of 1vs1 speed games. Let's go back now to what you said about your admiration for [player]shoop76[/player]. Of course I know that he's well-known on CC, and is a great tournament player in his own right with 55 tournament victory cups. But what specifically do you admire him for?
What can I say about Shoop76: He is a well organized TO. He's been doing a lot of tournaments and I always enjoy them a lot. I've known him since 2009 when I started my own Formula 1 Franchise tournaments. He joined most of the Race-Tournaments that year. As a player, he has great strategy and rarely make mistakes. If I face him in a 1vs1 game, I can tell in advance, no matter the map, that It will be a tough game. I have played 60 times against him on 1vs1, and I won 36, a 60% winning, so as you can see, I also have fun kicking his ass
You're a pretty accomplished TO yourself. Besides being 7th on the first page of the Tournament Winners Hall of Fame, with 45 victory cups, you're also 10th on the first page of the Tournament Organizer's Hall of Fame, with 66 completed tournaments, and a lot more on the way. What's your most memorable moment from this long and illustrious career?
I have 3 special moments in regards to winning tournaments: One is when I won my first tournament: Around Small Maps 1v1 Tournament 2 against one of my mentors: [player]DJ Teflon[/player]. It was an amazing feeling because I was in 5 different finals before that win and couldn't do it. The second "special moment" for me was winning my first tournament against [player]HighlanderAttack[/player] (another mentor) in Full Start Stadium. Check the chat, there is some funny stuff over there. And finally, but not less important, the third "special moment" was winning a long tournament that lasted several months: 2010 MLB Season
In regards to organizing tournaments, it makes me happy and proud to run International-Spanish Speaking only tournaments. Our community (Hispanic players in the Club de Conquista) is one of the biggest non-English speaking groups in Conquer Club. But the most important and the best completed tournament that I have ever run is the JRT's-2010 Formula 1 Championship. That tourney lasted 12 months and here are some stats from it:
12 Months of Racing Competition
19 Grand Prix
19 different maps
45 unique drivers
13 teams
264 total games
I won't ask a question about your foreign language tournaments, because I want you to write a feature article about those and I want you to save your comments about them for that article! (If you still remember this discussion. I also think you should do a feature article about the Formula 1 series!
Which brings us to another intriguing question: how did you get involved with running the Tournament Section of the newsletter, and how long have you been doing that?
A long time ago (about 2 years) I was part of the Newsletter Team as a reporter and I was in charge of putting together the list of tournaments signing up players, before the actual tournaments data base was developed.
After several months doing that, my wife got pregnant and the doctor informed us that it was a high risk pregnancy. Because of that, I decided to resign to my position and cut back my game load in order to dedicate more time to my little son and wife, and of course house duties as well.
Around the mid-October 2010, [player]Samuel812[/player] and [player]AndyDufresne[/player] contacted me to offer me the Tournament Newsletter Head position, because I was helping the Tournament Directors rescue abandoned tourneys and was training/helping first time TO's organize their tournaments. A few samples of my help:
So after trying it I decided to accept the position and I think I'm performing pretty well as a Team CC member.
You've certainly kept our Tournament Section fully staffed and active! Well, thank you for taking the time to answer my questions. I especially like how you took the time to dig up the links for me! Best of luck in all future endeavours![/spoiler][spoiler=Get Your Own Interview]One concluding note: when I volunteered for this project, I offered to interview "all of the tournament winners." How naive I was! I had no idea what a staggering number of tournaments there really are. Now I know there is no way I will be able to get to everyone. I intend to publish one or two interviews in every edition of the Dispatch, but even so I will probably only get to talk to about 5 or 10 percent of all the winners. My approach will be partially random and partially targeted. Some will be chosen because of their fame or amazing stats, some will be chosen because I find the tournament they were in to be unusual or especially interesting, and many will be chosen completely at random. I will pay special attention to those that are winning a tournament for the very first time. If you are looking forward to telling the story of the exciting tournament that you were just in and want to be on my list, please feel free to PM me any time.
[player]Dukasaur[/player].[/spoiler]
TPA Updateby [player]Angola[/player] [spoiler=TPA Update]The TPA (Tournament Players Association) continues to be the [player]sonicsteve[/player] show.
Mr. Steve is still atop the Scoreboard and even increased his lead slightly in the past two weeks. He now has 40.62 points, while [player]HighlanderAttack[/player] is still in second with 35.14 and [player]MudPuppy[/player] has overtaken [player]Timminz[/player] for third place with 33.86.
Be sure to visit the Create/Join a Tournament area to sign up for future TPA events, which will be ending in the next month or so.
New tournaments are posted on Mondays. [player]Benga[/player] is still looking for players for his Feudal War tournament, while [player]HighlanderAttack[/player] has a TPA Major event up.
Time is winding down on TPA Season I and TPA Season II is already in the planning stages. You can offer ideas for Season II here.[/spoiler]
Join This? Or Not!by Dukasaur, cleverly disguising himself as Soldierboy...
Hey folks! Psyched as ever to bring you the next set of Foundry lovin'! And I have three very important announcements: [player]No_Risk_No_Fun[/player], our Foundry Filmmaker, has completed a preview of his upcoming Dispatch video series, "Foundry Featurette", we have a new fortnightly tradition, and I'm officially taking on apprentices to make those interested into informative and analytical map commenters! And of course, [player]OliverFA[/player] brings us another another "Classic" this issue: Rail USA. Enjoy!
In this edition of the clan section, we have another in-depth analysis of the 2nd Annual Conqueror's Cup by yours truly, a brief synopsis on Newcomers Cup action by [player]jigger1986[/player], we welcome back [player]BoganGod[/player] to the team after a short hiatus as he mulls over a scenario faced by many among the clan scene, [player]Blackknight_6[/player] discusses the dynamics of forums within the clan, and [player]Master Fenrir[/player] returns for another gripping column on HardBalls as he tackles what it really means to be Conqueror!
Stay Tuned for the next issue of the ConquerClub Dispatch for an interrogation of [player]JoshyBoy[/player]. Post any questions you may have for them here --> Interrogation with Joshyboy
Submitting Your Own Articles
If you have a story you think the ConquerClub Community would find interesting, you can submit your articles to [player]nagerous[/player] and you may just see your article published in the Newsletter!
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), and we've been privileged to bolster the team a bit with some further additions to the Clan and Freestyle teams. Even [player]Victor Sullivan[/player] is experimenting with some intriguing concepts that you can see in our foundry section
.
Guilty as charged 
