An Ode to B.K. Barunt, with Shit in his Old-Man Drawers

[V.I.]

O him who in the love of Nature holds
Communion with her visible forms, she speaks
A various language; for his gayer hours
She has a voice of gladness, and a smile
And eloquence of beauty, and she glides
Into his darker musings, with a mild
And healing sympathy, that steals away
Their sharpness, ere he is aware. When thoughts
Of the last bitter hour come like a blight
Over thy spirit, and sad images
Of the stern agony, and shroud, and pall,
And breathless darkness, and the narrow house,
Make thee to shudder and grow sick at heart;--

Go forth, under the open sky, and list
To Nature's teachings, while from all around--
Earth and her waters, and the depths of air--
Comes a still voice--Yet a few days, and thee
The all-beholding sun shall see no more
In all his course; nor yet in the cold ground,
Where thy pale form was laid with many tears,
Nor in the embrace of ocean, shall exist
Thy image. Earth, that nourish'd thee, shall claim
Thy growth, to be resolved to earth again,
And, lost each human trace, surrendering up
Thine individual being, shalt thou go
To mix for ever with the elements,
To be a brother to the insensible rock,
And to the sluggish clod, which the rude swain
Turns with his share, and treads upon. The oak
Shall send his roots abroad, and pierce thy mould.

Yet not to thine eternal resting-place
Shalt thou retire alone, nor couldst thou wish
Couch more magnificent. Thou shalt lie down
With patriarchs of the infant world--with kings,
The powerful of the earth--the wise, the good,
Fair forms, and hoary seers of ages past,
All in one mighty sepulchre. The hills
Rock-ribb'd and ancient as the sun,--the vales
Stretching in pensive quietness between;
The venerable woods; rivers that move
In majesty, and the complaining brooks
That make the meadows green; and, pour'd round all,
Old Ocean's grey and melancholy waste,--
Are but the solemn decorations all
Of the great tomb of man. The golden sun,
The planets, all the infinite host of heaven,
Are shining on the sad abodes of death,
Through the still lapse of ages.

All that tread
The globe are but a handful to the tribes
That slumber in its bosom.--Take the wings
Of morning, pierce the Barcan wilderness,
Or lose thyself in the continuous woods
Where rolls the Oregon and hears no sound
Save his own dashings--yet the dead are there:
And millions in those solitudes, since first
The flight of years began, have laid them down
In their last sleep--the dead reign there alone.
So shalt thou rest: and what if thou withdraw
In silence from the living, and no friend
Take note of thy departure? All that breathe
Will share thy destiny. The gay will laugh
When thou art gone, the solemn brood of care
Plod on, and each one as before will chase
His favourite phantom; yet all these shall leave
Their mirth and their employments, and shall come
And make their bed with thee. As the long train
Of ages glides away, the sons of men,
The youth in life's green spring, and he who goes
In the full strength of years, matron and maid,
The speechless babe, and the gray-headed man--
Shall one by one be gathered to thy side
By those who in their turn shall follow them.

So live, that when thy summons comes to join
The innumerable caravan which moves
To that mysterious realm where each shall take
His chamber in the silent halls of death,
Thou go not, like the quarry-slave at night,
Scourged by his dungeon; but, sustain'd and soothed
By an unfaltering trust, approach thy grave,
Like one who wraps the drapery of his couch
About him, and lies down to pleasant dreams.

- William Cullen Bryant

[2dimes]

I just changed him, I swear he does this on purpose.

[b.k. barunt]

I just changed him, I swear he does this on purpose.

<farts loudly>

[rockfist]

.

[Coxey]

This barunt guy plays conquer club really weirdly - I've added him to my foes list because there's no reasoning with him.

[CreepersWiener]

Fuckin write the guy a real poem, don't cut and paste some stupid intellectualized bullshit!

Like this:

BK Barunt
Barunt to the B to the M To the K!
Some call him macho, others call him Gay!
When I play games with him, he spits and sputters flames,
He rubs his nuts with butter and gives his genitals names,

"On Fucker, On Plucker, On One-Eyed Worm of Love"
He did have sex with a turnip and his dick he did shove,
Into a Watermelon that looked like a big, plump, round, and shiny Ass,
And when he was finished he said,"Honibaz!"

[b.k. barunt]

Ole!


Honibaz

[CreepersWiener]

BK's Old Man Diaper

Some say it's not pretty, and others think it's sick,
But when Barunt shits his pants, it gets all over his wrinkly dick.
"Oh, Dear!"says BK as he shat his old man diaper,
"I wish I could shoot my crap like a sneaky Vietnam Sniper!"

Barunt scratched his ass with a stick from the yard,
When he pulled it out, it smelled like fuckin lard!
"I've eaten too much bacon and fried chicken served in grease!
And now my diaper's full of shit, covered in cotton fleece!"

Honibaz!

[jefjef]

Courtesy of Blink 182

I'm sick of offending everyone I meet
(Go, go, go, go)
I'm sick of crying myself to sleep on rubber sheets
(Go)
I had an accident today
I left a soil on a bus seat, I didn't know what to say

But, I guess it all depends
(Undergarments)
Well, I guess it all depends
(Undergarments)

Step back into life
(Go, go)
No more soiled nights alone
Well, I guess that I don't have a care
If I don't have a load in my underwear

[Falkomagno]

I got my Cat Scratch Fever eight-track
My best friend's in a gun rack
I'm a lowlife
I owe everybody money
I think racist jokes are funny
I'm a lowlife
I got a dirty mind, a gutter mouth
I'm makin' time, I'm goin' out
With your wife

Cuz I'm a lowlife
I'm a lowlife

I got kids I never seen
And their momma's seventeen
I'm a lowlife
I take strippers out to breakfast
You can add that to my checklist
I'm a lowlife
Ahh the landlord called the rent is due
I spent it all on a Kiss tattoo
I Rock n Roll all night

Cuz I'm a lowlife
I'm a lowlife
I'm a lowlife
Livin' the highlife

I'm watchin' porno on the TV
Wonderin' why she'd ever leave me
I'm a lowlife
The object of my affection
Asked the police for protection
I'm a lowlife
The romance is gone, I'm doin' fine
Me and your mom had a real good time
Just last night

Cuz I'm a lowlife
I'm a lowlife

I make black music for the white man
Keep cocaine upon my nightstand
I'm a lowlife
Ain't never hung out in the Catskills
But I've been to jail in Nashville
I'm a lowlife
I've got a dirty mind, a gutter mouth
I'm makin' time, I'm goin' out
With your wife

[clapper011]

umm some ermm.. nice?.. poems there lol

[CreepersWiener]

:shock: umm some ermm.. nice?.. poems there lol

You should write one then.

[b.k. barunt]

So right now i have a thread dedicated to chopping my pics on cosmicoutpost.com, and a thread at conquerclub honoring me with scatological odes. Is this my fooking fifteen minutes?


Honibaz

[daddy1gringo]

I always wanted to ask: is that you in your avvy, if so, what is that yellow thing, and what are you doing?

[Coxey]

I've wondered that too. Also there was an old holiday snap in my mate's photo collection that appeared from nowhere and I'm sure that old man was in it.

[b.k. barunt]

I always wanted to ask: is that you in your avvy, if so, what is that yellow thing, and what are you doing?

That's me and the infamous Mexican Papaya (another story). My son (hookshotwillaby) and i were on the Mexican border in Douglas, Arizona. The pic was taken after a night of drunken carousing and i did not have sex with that papaya.


Honibaz

[Timminz]

I always wanted to ask: is that you in your avvy, if so, what is that yellow thing, and what are you doing?

That's me and the infamous Mexican Papaya (another story). My son (hookshotwillaby) and i were on the Mexican border in Douglas, Arizona. The pic was taken after a night of drunken carousing and i did not have sex with that papaya.


Honibaz

[CreepersWiener]

I always wanted to ask: is that you in your avvy, if so, what is that yellow thing, and what are you doing?

That's me and the infamous Mexican Papaya (another story). My son (hookshotwillaby) and i were on the Mexican border in Douglas, Arizona. The pic was taken after a night of drunken carousing and i did not have sex with that papaya.


Honibaz

Papaya Mexicana
It was a hot summer's day in Douglas, Arizona,
All I had to drink was Dos Equis and Corona,
I played quarters at the bar while eating pretzels for free,
And along came a man named Hook Shot Willaby!

"Excuse me good sir, but I must say,
You remind me of my father who once traveled this way,
He had an old Model T he drove to Phoenix City,
He kept it polished and clean and it always looked so pretty!"

"Well, son, that's awful nice and it makes me quite glad,
That an old drunk like me would remind you of good ol' Dad,
I've lived in this town for many a desert year,
And I have never heard such a word come across to my ear!"

The young man waved his hand and ordered me a drink,
I sat at the bar and started to think,
About how much I liked this kid and what brought him to town,
I picked up my beer and I slammed it on down.

"You know, boy, many a man has sat at this bar,
And talked about women, religion, and their favorite car,
But you are the first, I might say,
That has ever reminisced of his father that way."

"I know, good sir, but I am no liar,
I am the lead salesman of Mexican Papaya.
If you don't believe me, here is my badge,
When you feel all alone, it's like having a Vaj,

Papaya is slimy, juicy, and sweet,
It comes in quite handy as portable pussy meat!
You see, you cut a dick sized hole in the very end,
And you run it under warm water and then,

You stick your peter in the fruity, meaty core,
You pretend your fucking some Mexicana Whore,
Or perhaps anal is more your style?
You can pretend it's a man named Gomer Pyle!"

"No thank you, young sir,"I answered the man,
"I have great success by just using my hand,
I also like to have sex with Creole Jambalaya."
I told him he could keep his Mexican Papaya!

Honibaz

[clapper011]

:shock: umm some ermm.. nice?.. poems there lol

You should write one then.

no.,..lol im not very good at this stuff like you guys are lol

[daddy1gringo]

I always wanted to ask: is that you in your avvy, if so, what is that yellow thing, and what are you doing?

That's me and the infamous Mexican Papaya (another story). My son (hookshotwillaby) and i were on the Mexican border in Douglas, Arizona. The pic was taken after a night of drunken carousing and i did not have sex with that papaya.

Ok, so are you trying to look through it like a telescope? Wiping the sweat off your brow? Using it as a pillow? Using it in place of a steak to treat a black eye earned in the previous night's activities?

Against my better judgment I'll ask for the story of the infamous Mexican papaya.

[b.k. barunt]

The saga of the Mexican Papaya is not for the faint of heart. As to what i was doing at the time of the pic, i was pondering what made the papaya such a chick magnet.


Honibaz

[Metsfanmax]

So, I know I haven't been around the forums much and I apologize, but...

who is b.k. barunt and why does he sign his posts with "Honibaz?"

[oddzy]

there once was a man named barunt
who used papaya in lieu of a cunt
the hole he did gore
was 6 inches or more
and ten, measured back to front

[BigBallinStalin]

So, I know I haven't been around the forums much and I apologize, but...

who is b.k. barunt and why does he sign his posts with "Honibaz?"

Who is he? This thread answers that for you.

As for signing posts, everyone does that, so why is it such a big deal?


Ze'evf

[b.k. barunt]

So, I know I haven't been around the forums much and I apologize, but...

who is b.k. barunt and why does he sign his posts with "Honibaz?"

Do not question the Honibaz.


Honibaz