Conquer Club

Posted: **Thu Dec 13, 2007 9:51 am**

From one of my all-time favorite movies:

Character 1: We're extremely thirsty, sir.
Character 2: I have a really low tolerance for dehydration.
Character 1: I've seen her dehydrate, sir. It's pretty gross.

Posted: **Fri Dec 14, 2007 12:29 pm**

No guesses? Let's go with another, easier one:

Character 1: What if your home... what if your family... what if your dope was on fire?
Character 2: Impossible, sir. It's in Johnson's underwear.

Posted: **Fri Dec 14, 2007 12:39 pm**

Breakfast Club!

Posted: **Fri Dec 14, 2007 2:23 pm**

Hell yeah! Take it, cola!

Posted: **Sat Dec 15, 2007 9:25 am**

Apols for lateness.

new quote:

A: Are you afraid of my Guatemalan-ness?
B: Your what?
A: My Guatemalan-ness, my natural heat.

Posted: **Sat Dec 15, 2007 10:47 am**

Was that from Along Came Polly?

Posted: **Sat Dec 15, 2007 12:16 pm**

UselessTriviaMan wrote:Was that from Along Came Polly?

sorry UTM

Posted: **Sun Dec 16, 2007 12:55 am**

the bird cage?

Posted: **Sun Dec 16, 2007 4:09 am**

Damnit, I was gonna say birdcage.

Posted: **Sun Dec 16, 2007 10:24 am**

Incandenza wrote:Damnit, I was gonna say birdcage.

Yeah,yeah, I think so.

Posted: **Sun Dec 16, 2007 2:08 pm**

assuming i am correct i will continue
" Few people understand the psychology of dealing with a highway traffic cop. A normal speeder will panic and immediately pull over to the side. This is wrong. It arouses contempt in the cop heart. Make the bastard chase you. He will follow. But he won't know what to make of your blinker signal that says you are about to turn right. This is to let him know you're pulling off for a proper place to talk. It will take him a moment to realize that he's about to make a 180 degree turn at speed, but you will be ready for it. Brace for the g's, and fast heel-toe work."

Posted: **Sun Dec 16, 2007 2:43 pm**

it sounds like something from gone in 60 seconds.

Posted: **Sun Dec 16, 2007 3:13 pm**

Posted: **Sun Dec 16, 2007 7:18 pm**

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

New quote:
"What's the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman?
[pause]
You can unscrew a lightbulb.
[pause]
See? No sense of humor whatsoever!"

Posted: **Sun Dec 16, 2007 7:33 pm**

That's one of my favorite Steve Martin flicks! My Blue Heaven

Uh, Lord, hallowed be Thy name. May our feet be swift; may our bats be mighty; may our balls... be plentiful. Lord, I'd just like to thank You for that waitress in South Bend. You know who she is - she kept calling Your name.

Posted: **Sun Dec 16, 2007 9:55 pm**

A League of Their Own

New Quote:
"Well I guess if I had to swear one way or another, I'd say Lazlo wasn't insane. He just had very strange rhythms. But he stomped on the terra. Lord Buckley said that. It's hard to say he got what he deserved, because he never really got anything, at least not in this story. And right now, this story is all we have ... It's sad. But what's really sad is it never got weird enough for me. I moved to the country when the boat got too crowded. Then I learned that President Nixon had been eaten by white cannibals on an island near Tijuana for no good reason at all. Golly, you hear a lot of strange and unnatural things about the world these days. Lazlo and Nixon are both gone now, but I don't think I'm going to believe that. Not until I can gnaw on their skull, because it still hasn't gotten weird enough for me."

Posted: **Mon Dec 17, 2007 12:10 pm**

I can safely say that I've never, ever seen that movie. That's a line that certainly would have stuck in my head.

Posted: **Mon Dec 17, 2007 12:32 pm**

Sounds like HST, but I can't finger the movie. Not Fear and Loathing

Posted: **Mon Dec 17, 2007 1:28 pm**

Maybe it's Burroughs. A bit of the Naked Lunch, perhaps?

Posted: **Mon Dec 17, 2007 3:05 pm**

2nd quote:

A: Hi sir, it's Harris from the Post. Can I get you anything sir?
B: How's the family Harris?
A: Oh the family, well that's bad news. The screwheads finally came and took my daughter away. Let me ask you a question sir, what is this country doing for the doomed? There are two kinds of people in this country, the doomed and the screwheads. Savage tribal thugs who live off their legal incomes, brow deep out there; no respect for human dignity. They don't know what you and I understand, you know what I mean.
B: You ever play football, Harris?
A: Yes sir, thank you sir. I played in college, and they're gonna get your daughter too sir. I've heard their rallies, they like Julie but Tricia... and they really hate you sir. You know that one and a half of the State Senate of Utah are screwheads. You know I was never really frightened by the bopheads and the potheads with their silliness never really frightened me either, but these goddam screwheads, they terrify me. And the poor doomed, the young, and the silly, the honest, the weak, the Italians ... they're doomed, they're lost, they're helpless, they're somebody else's meal, they're like pigs in the wilderness.
B: Come here Harris, come here. f*ck the doomed!

Oh, and a hint: Spurgistan's on the right track.

Posted: **Mon Dec 17, 2007 3:57 pm**

Whatever it is, this sounds like a movie that I need to be putting in my netflix queue post-fucking-haste.

Posted: **Mon Dec 17, 2007 6:16 pm**

Obvious, give-away hint: Starring Bill Murray and Peter Boyle.

Posted: **Mon Dec 17, 2007 6:33 pm**

o its where the buffalo roam

Posted: **Mon Dec 17, 2007 9:21 pm**

ijnmusashi wrote:o its where the buffalo roam

Yes indeed!

Posted: **Mon Dec 17, 2007 11:22 pm**

ok here's a new one

:Where are the radiation protective suits?
:We don't have any. The warehouse was out, so they sent us chemical protective suits instead.
:They may as well wear raincoats.

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