DKs Intensities in Ten Cities! [Winner=TX AG 90]

[mickunited333]

in please

[Dukasaur]

updated.

[perchorin]

I'll play.

[Zealand]

In please

[razoget999]

in please.

[Dukasaur]

one spot left, plus we need some reserves!

Oh, so close!

[DoomYoshi]

Will you accept reserves from the eliminated pool?

[Dukasaur]

Will you accept reserves from the eliminated pool?

Interesting concept. I have thought of that, but I'm not sure if some people will consider that cheating. There's nothing explicitly prohibiting it in the site rules, but the unorthodoxy may raise some eyebrows.

[jricart]

IN please!

[hmsps]

in if there is space

[General Brewsie]

When jricart says I should join, I join. IN please, if you still have space or need reservists.

[Dukasaur]

hmsps gets the last spot in the regular line-up!

General Brewsie becomes the first reserve.

I'm going to mark this as [FULL] by I will continue accepting reserves.

[Mekii]

If you need a reserve look me up.

Mekii

[Dukasaur]

If you need a reserve look me up.

Mekii

Thank you. Added as a reserve.

Just waiting for tournament privileges now.

[ElricTheGreat]

Hey Dk .. congrats on filling this thing up !!

Just took a look at the players confirmed ... where is your name ... u mean you are not coming on the Journey????

[Dukasaur]

Hey Dk .. congrats on filling this thing up !!

Just took a look at the players confirmed ... where is your name ... u mean you are not coming on the Journey????

I'll be your tour guide, on the bus with you every step of the way, eating the same bad truck stop food...

No, I won't be playing -- I think it's a conflict of interest for tourney organizers to play in their own tourneys. Yes, I realize there's no rule against it, but my personal feeling has always been that it smells bad -- especially if the TO wins.


.

[Dukasaur]

Turns out rmjw10 was on the players' list twice. So General Brewsie is upgraded from first reserve to active player. This leaves us with only 1 reserve, which is a bit thin, so by all means if anyone you know wants in here, let them know.

[Dukasaur]

Well, friends, our Ten Cities tour is finally up and running!

The tournament filled up Thursday night and tournament privileges were granted early this morning at seven minutes after midnight. I've just finished the first phase game invites.

Our first stop is Montreal. 56 of you arrive here, but only 40 will continue on to our second stop in Vancouver. Percentage-wise, this is the biggest cut of the tournament except for the finale in New York, so please take this phase seriously, and play your best!

All the detailed stop descriptions are given in the second post in the tournament thread, but just as a convenience I will reproduce here the description of the Montreal stop:

Phase One, Montreal: Appropriately enough, we will begin our tour at the place where CC began, the beautiful city of Montreal. 56 of us will arrive, but only 40 will continue on. The other 16 will take up permanent residence at some streetside cafe, which really isn't a bad fate at all!

Each player will participate in the following:
One 7-player Manual Nuclear Chained Sunny Standard game
One 7-player Automatic Escalating Chained Foggy Standard game
One 7-player Automatic Escalating Unlimited Sunny Standard game
Each of the standard games scored by ranking: 6 points to the winner, 5 points to the 2nd place finisher, etc., all the way down to zero points for the first person eliminated.
One Automatic Flat-rate Chained Foggy Quads game, 5 points to each participant on the winning team.
5 points awarded for the "colour and flavour" bonus.
Maximum possible: 28 points

Sometime later today I will be posting the first C&F task. I will also PM the task to you, but your response to the C&F task cannot be PM'd. If you want to score C&F points you must post your response in the tournament thread!

I've already had to use one of our reserves because there was a duplicate in the players' list, and there's a chance that someone else may be dropping out early on, so our reserve list will be empty. If there is anyone you know that might be interested please tell them that we are definitely still accepting reserves!

[Dukasaur]

It is time for the first Colour and Flavour task. Since Montreal is our first stop, we will start off with something easy. The C&F task for this stop is simply to post a joke or funny anecdote featuring Montreal.

As an example, here's my Montreal joke.

[spoiler=Dukasaurs favourite Montreal joke]1st Montrealer: "I hear they're going to repave Autoroute 40 -- make it all nice and smooth."

2nd Montrealer: "Hahahaha hahahahahaha hahahahaha bwaaa-hahahaha hohoho hahaha"

(I'm sorry. If you've never driven in Montreal you'll never know just how funny this is.)[/spoiler]
I have a part two to that joke, by the way. Are you ready for it?

[spoiler=Montreal joke part two]1st Montrealer: "I hear when the construction is finished, traffic will move smoothly through the Decarie interchange."

2nd Montrealer: "Bwaaahaahaha! Hahahahahahahahaha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Hoho, haha, heee heee heee, Ha! Ha! Bwaaahaha! Ho! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Hoho, haha, heee heee heee, Ha! Ha! Bwaaahaha! Heeee Heeeeeeee Heeeeeee! Ha! Bwahahahaha! Ha! Ha! Hoho, haha, heee heee heee, Ha! Ha! Bwaaahaha! Heeee Heeeeeeee Heeeeeee! Ha! Bwahahahaha! Bwaaahaahaha! Hahahaha Hoho, haha, heee heee heee, Ha! Bwaaahaha! Heeeehahahooohooo! Ha! Bwaaahaha! Heeee Heeeeeeee Heeeeeee! Ha! Bwahahahaha! Ha! Ha! Hoho, haha, heee heee heee, Ha!


(Sorry, just couldn't resist.) [/spoiler]
Okay, for the 90% of you who didn't think my joke was very funny, here's your chance to show that you can do better. That's all the C&F task requires of you, is to post one funny story, anecdote, or joke, which is identifiably Montreal-related in some way. You have 72 hours.

Remember, in order to score points, your submission must be posted in the tournament thread. Submissions sent by PM or any other means will be ignored!

The judges will make their decision and let us know. I am not one of the judges. If you want to review the judges panel, see the FOURTH post in this thread.

Edit March 20th. I'm inviting our last remaining reserve, Mekii, to participate in the C&F competition in the (very realistic) expectation that he may be called up as an active player tomorrow morning.

[wolfpack0530]

Two cannibals from Montreal are eating a clown. One says, "Does this taste funny to you?"

If you have ever been to Montreal, you know there are cannibals everywhere. In fact the only things more annoying are all the damn clowns, so really this situation is a win win!!

[jricart]

The two Montrealers stopped at Schwartz's, the famous Montreal Hebrew Delicatessen:

1st Mountrealer: I hate Pastrami, but instead of that I took one of the famous Smoked Meat sandwich!

2nd Montrealer: Its the same thing you dumb ass! Hahahahaha - Bwahahahaha!

Is our host the first Mountrealer? Bwahahahaha!

JRT

[DJENRE]

Nice challenge DUKA

[spoiler=QUEBECOIS]I AM QUÉBECOIS!

I'm not unemployed, or smuggling cigarettes across the border

I don't eat Pepsi and Mae West for breakfast

I don't watch the hockey game while doing it doggy style.

And no, I don't know Claude, Manon or Francois in Abitibi-Temiscamingue,

but I'm sure they have nice teeth

I smoke in church

I speak Quebecois and Jouale, not French or English

I pronounce it 'turd' not 'third'

And eating french fries with cheese makes sense, mon oesti!

I believe in distinct society as long as someone else pays for it

I believe in language police not equal rights

And caulice, I believe that Club Supersexe is an appropriate place for my wife and me to celebrate our anniversaire,

what the hell, she goes on at ten anyway!

In Quebec, the Stanley Cup actually comes around more often than Halley's Comet

I can get beer at the Dépanneur, not the convenience store!

And maybe I can't turn right on a red light, but tabarnacle! I can go right through it!

Because Quebec is the world's largest producer of maple syrup,

the home of Celine Dion AND Roch Voisine

The land where everybody is shacking up

And the drinking age is just a suggestion!

Je m'appelle Gui

And I am NOT Canadian! (Mautadit tabarnacle oesti...Merci bonjour la visite)[/spoiler]

[mcshanester29]

In court the other day there was a case regarding the custody of a small child.
The judge asked the boy, "do you want to live with your mother?"
He replied, "No I don't want to live with her because she beats me!".
The judge then asked, "Do you want to live with your father?"
The boy stated, "No he beats me too."
Finally the judge asked, "where do you want to live?"
The child responded, "I want to live with the Montreal Canadiens!".
The judge asked, "Why do you want to live with the Montreal Canadiens?"
The boy exclaimed, "Because the Montreal Canadiens don't beat anybody!"

[koontz1973]

Two boys are playing hockey on a pond in a park in Toronto, when one is attacked by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his stick, wedges it down the dogs collar and twists,breaking the dogs neck. A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident,and rushes over to interview the boy. "Young Leafs Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts writing in his notebook. "But I'm not a Leafs fan," the little hero replied. "Sorry, since we are in Toronto, I just assumed you were." said the reporter and starts again. "Little Jays Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack" he continued writing in his notebook. "I'm not a Jays fan either," the boy said. "I assumed everyone in Toronto was either for the Leafs or Jays fan."What team do you root for?" the reporter asked. "I'm a Montreal Canadians fan." the child said. The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Little French Bastard from Montreal Kills Beloved Family Pet.

Hope you like it as much as I did.

[DoomYoshi]

Three Montreal-style bagels are sitting in an oven.
The first says to the second: "Do you find it hot in here?"
The second turns to the third : "Holy shit, a talking bagel!"