LYR wrote:Damn, you guys are messing with my puny 13 year-old mind. Sure, I have thought about death before, and for literally hours and hours about how dark energy is expanding the universe and the whole universe gets fucked in the end. Then I see everyone around me, superficial assholes, wondering if they have even got a clue whats going on in my mind, and if they have even the faintest clue of how miserable their lives are going to be when they grow up (I'm not saying mine isn't). Then I think about God, and I can perfectly understand atheists' points of view on life, then I look at my religious upbringings (Judaism), and try and see the it, and all other religions, are just a way to try and define the undefinable and what we are and why we are here. Then I think about my life, and my friends, and whats going to happen to me in the future, then I scold myself for being so superficial, and only worrying about myself, while there are so many horrors in the world. Then I find myself up at 1:30 in the morning, usually the time when I am attempting to fall asleep but actually thinking all the things that I have just described to you, and then I am freaked the hell out. THEN, finally, the saying "ignorance is bliss" finally comes into affect and I fall asleep, forgetting about everything I had just though about until the following night, and my life is just a repetitive cycle. Then I think that the point of life is to be happy. No, its to find true love. No, its to get stoned and smashed every night and having fun. No, everybody just dies sad and alone and realize that they have done nothing with their lives. Then, of course, as I think everyone else who thinks like I think (not quite sure how many people that is), thinks of committing suicide just to simplify things.
Then i find myself at 1:35 in the morning writing a response to a 4-page long thread, wondering if anyone will take the writings of a 13 year-old seriously, even wondering if this has anything to do with the topic. Well, I said what needed to be said, and I hope it can somehow contribute to your conversation.
Deeper thoughts than I had when I was thirteen... I'll give you credit for that. I can't suggest much other than keep on keeping on. Keep an open mind. Check and recheck everything. Avoid Nappy (irony, ok read one or two of his posts, then avoid him). And take it the hell easy. You're thirteen. You have plenty of time to ponder the deep dark mysteries of the universe. Keep it casual for now. I think you're supposed to be probing the deep, dark secrets of the opposite sex at the moment (figuratively, of course). Eventually you'll learn to give up on both deep, dark fronts (nobody has a friggin clue) and go with whatever the hell makes the most sense at the moment.

