Conquer Club

Haagen-Dazs give you dry ice with your ice cream. That shit's awesome to drop in boiled/boiling water.

I refuse to eat Haagen-Das out of principle. Any American company pretending to be European is the worst type of criminal. What's next - internet piracy?

This is a great time to remember that conquer club and fuckfrance.com are bedfellows.

http://www.conquerclub.com/forum/postin ... 8&t=143484

Who's winning? I have saxi foed.

DoomYoshi wrote:I refuse to eat Haagen-Das out of principle. Any American company pretending to be European is the worst type of criminal. What's next - internet piracy?

And here I thought it was a totally drunk person trying to say "Happy Days." Are you sure it has nothing to do with the Fonz?

So, spending 48 hours in France is a human rights violation. If you have been subject to this unfortunate treatment, the French government will offer you 5000 Euros.

Dairy Queen offers no such recompense if you are there for an overnight stay.

DoomYoshi wrote:So, spending 48 hours in France is a human rights violation. If you have been subject to this unfortunate treatment, the French government will offer you 5000 Euros.

Dairy Queen offers no such recompense if you are there for an overnight stay.

fucking ridiculous. so basically let's just encourage these guys to do it again. 5000 euros is like 3 years salary for average somali people i guess. That's what they get when things turn bad, and millions of € of ransom when the hostage taking runs smooth. Like that they'll be able to buy more weapons and make it more of a war zone.
Also, isn't it considered french territory if you aprehend pirates on a french ship in international seas? Let them just exploit that loophole and make the somali coast even more impossible to navigate for any none military ship. f*ck those hippies.

betiko wrote:

DoomYoshi wrote:So, spending 48 hours in France is a human rights violation. If you have been subject to this unfortunate treatment, the French government will offer you 5000 Euros.

Dairy Queen offers no such recompense if you are there for an overnight stay.

fucking ridiculous. so basically let's just encourage these guys to do it again. 5000 euros is like 3 years salary for average somali people i guess. That's what they get when things turn bad, and millions of € of ransom when the hostage taking runs smooth. Like that they'll be able to buy more weapons and make it more of a war zone.
Also, isn't it considered french territory if you aprehend pirates on a french ship in international seas? Let them just exploit that loophole and make the somali coast even more impossible to navigate for any none military ship. f*ck those hippies.

Luckily, the Chinese military is patrolling the waters. Let's let them deal with the pirates, so we can accuse them of human rights violations.

The hilarious problem is they probably ate the best food of their life in french prison.

the funny thing is that if you're labeled "pirate" you have rights, but if you're labelled "terrorist" you don't, and you do pretty much the same thing. So if it's just for money it's ok, but if it's for a cause then we can do what we want to you.

Terrorists don't get all inclusive trips to France for the weekend?

They must have shitty game shows.

as a Minnesotan i have to go with dary queen at least there not selling ships to russia (ok that was a cheep shot)

alright at least they welcome visitors in a friendly manor (ok that was a cheep shot)

ok ok at least they don't fold to the might of Germany (ok that was a cheep shot)

alright lets try again at least they don't have a rain of terror only a rain of delightful blizzards (ok that was a cheep shot)

ok at least they are forward thinking they had trademark rights on the word blizzard for 20 years before the blizzard came out unlike the 20 years between wars with Germany (ok that was a cheep shot)

dam this is getting hard....

oh France has whine and cheese

i hope they don't whine about my choice (ok that was a cheep shot)

DoomYoshi wrote:Terrorists don't get all inclusive trips to France for the weekend?

They must have shitty game shows.

Some do! But the latest trend is to become a terrorist and move to daesh with your family. There s like 2000 french muslims that have been indoctrinated and moved there with their family. The good thing is that they will probably never come back, as if you are a deserter you get shot. If you are stupid enough to believe those djihaddists depicting a perfect world over skype if you move there, with 1000€ bounty per kid and 2000€ per man... Well this part is more than possible.
By the way, if you are american you get double the money cause you are the best advertising possible!
I heard they have all the tanks and material left by the americans when they left irak. The one they are unable to use they had to destroy it.

betiko wrote: France isn't as bad as you describe it.

French President in Borats land

targetman377 wrote:as a Minnesotan i have to go with dary queen at least there not selling ships to russia (ok that was a cheep shot)

As it turns out, France isn't selling ships to Russia either.

Dukasaur wrote:

targetman377 wrote:as a Minnesotan i have to go with dary queen at least there not selling ships to russia (ok that was a cheep shot)

As it turns out, France isn't selling ships to Russia either.

we also have pretty bad english teachers in france, but I'm sure even one of those would come in handy for targetman. He'd also explain that ww2 didn't last 20 years.
yeah, too easy.

betiko wrote: we also have pretty bad english teachers in france

we can tell







J/K! Your English is better than most Englishmen.

The French foreign legion training is rigorous jungle training, designed to make killing machines. The French foreign legion spends most of the time now protecting French interests in South America. There are indigenous people who live there who want money from the resources, but the French are trying to keep it for themselves. So they hire punks from around the world to learn french and go kill the natives.


The Dairy Queen training is designed to enable better sweeping tactics.

DoomYoshi wrote:I refuse to eat Haagen-Das out of principle. Any American company pretending to be European is the worst type of criminal. What's next - internet piracy?

What about a European company pretending to be an Islamic caliphate?

mrswdk wrote:

DoomYoshi wrote:I refuse to eat Haagen-Das out of principle. Any American company pretending to be European is the worst type of criminal. What's next - internet piracy?

What about a European company pretending to be an Islamic caliphate?

how about american secret services pretending to be an islamic caliphate?

DoomYoshi wrote:So, spending 48 hours in France is a human rights violation.

That's not what I have heard. The worst problem in Parish according to my friends from America is that the transit system shuts down at night and so you might have to take a long walk to the hotel in Paris if you stay out too late at night. I actually knew someone who spent YEARS in France, although he tended to work for public radio (which is also a human rights violation).

tzor wrote:The worst problem in Parish according to my friends from America is that the transit system shuts down at night and so you might have to take a long walk to the hotel in Paris if you stay out too late at night

What, Paris doesn't have taxis?

mrswdk wrote:

tzor wrote:The worst problem in Parish according to my friends from America is that the transit system shuts down at night and so you might have to take a long walk to the hotel in Paris if you stay out too late at night

What, Paris doesn't have taxis?

Yeah, a good example of a guy unable to find his way when he s abroad because "it has to be like home". Yes, the metro is closed from 1 am (2 am on week ends) to 5 am.
Different solutions:

1) order a minicab service. They will text you when they are there to pick you up and will tell you in advance the price.
2) take a regular taxi
3) take a night bus, cause yeah they exist and subtitute the metro at those hours.
4) take an autolib' (electric car anyone can rent for a simple commute)
5) take a velib' (free bike for half an hour, 1 euro for an hour)
6) go there walking and use your smartphone to find your way. Paris is much small than you think.
7) continue partying till 5 am if all you want is your damn metro.

Conclusion: you got lame friends.

Or, travel to an alternate dimension where France won the 7 years war.

DoomYoshi wrote:Or, travel to an alternate dimension where France won the 7 years war.

In the alternative dimension the war lasts 20 years!