Conquer Club

12. Polygamy and other such nonsense you guys are coming up with are from offshoots of some of the reformed sects of Mormonism.

pimpdave wrote:1. Jesus was really Lucifer's brother in the spirit world, and it was only due to a "heavenly council" vote that Jesus became our redeemer instead of Satan!

Can some mormons (or people who know about this stuff) expand on this? sounds kinda interesting...

13. Mormons can see in the dark.

lurkerleader wrote:12. Polygamy and other such nonsense you guys are coming up with are from offshoots of some of the reformed sects of Mormonism.

So you're saying Joseph Smith was a liar?

14. There are many accounts of Joseph Smith's first vision besides the one they present to you, and all are different. Mormons deny this, but it is substantiated by numerous sources to whom Smith revealed his first vision.

Lootifer wrote:

pimpdave wrote:1. Jesus was really Lucifer's brother in the spirit world, and it was only due to a "heavenly council" vote that Jesus became our redeemer instead of Satan!

Can some mormons (or people who know about this stuff) expand on this? sounds kinda interesting...

In order to expand on this there are many facets of the Mormon gospel that first need to be understood, such as the nature of God and the Mormon belief in the pre-mortal existence.

Ant-mormons like pimpdave love to over simplify concepts like this by throwing out these types of one liners with the goal of trying to manipulate people into believing a false premise through some kind of conjecture.

Pimpdave doesn't really care about the truth. He has an axe to grind with the Mormon faith, for whatever reason, and he will do whatever is necessary to bash the Mormon faith, even if that means being dishonest.

demonfork wrote:

Lootifer wrote:

pimpdave wrote:1. Jesus was really Lucifer's brother in the spirit world, and it was only due to a "heavenly council" vote that Jesus became our redeemer instead of Satan!

Can some mormons (or people who know about this stuff) expand on this? sounds kinda interesting...

In order to expand on this there are many facets of the Mormon gospel that first need to be understood, such as the nature of God and the Mormon belief in the pre-mortal existence.

Ant-mormons like pimpdave love to over simplify concepts like this by throwing out these types of one liners with the goal of trying to manipulate people into believing a false premise through some kind of conjecture.

Pimpdave doesn't really care about the truth. He has an axe to grind with the Mormon faith, for whatever reason, and he will do whatever is necessary to bash the Mormon faith, even if that means being dishonest.

Oh, kinda like how all religions have been spreading lies and half-truths for centuries with the intent to manipulate the masses? Is what PD is doing the same? Yeah, I thought so too.

Um, these are all facts. I'm not saying I believe this stuff, I'm saying what their cult believes.

15. It's a nifty little mormon trick to be able to turn off emotions at will, especially feelings concerning sexuality:



In other words, EMOTIONLESS HEATHENS! Cuz ya know, that's how that works.

-rd

rdsrds2120 wrote:15. It's a nifty little mormon trick to be able to turn off emotions at will, especially feelings concerning sexuality:



In other words, EMOTIONLESS HEATHENS! Cuz ya know, that's how that works.

-rd

Ugh, I have to go see this sometime.

Army of GOD wrote:

rdsrds2120 wrote:15. It's a nifty little mormon trick to be able to turn off emotions at will, especially feelings concerning sexuality:



In other words, EMOTIONLESS HEATHENS! Cuz ya know, that's how that works.

-rd

Ugh, I have to go see this sometime.

IT'S PRETTY GOOD. Saw it last summer. Seeing American Idiot January, woohoo.

-rd

WHY DONT YOU JUST LOOK IN THE MIRROR!


LooooooooooooooooooooooooooooL

Army of GOD wrote:WHY DONT YOU JUST LOOK IN THE MIRROR!


LooooooooooooooooooooooooooooL

That's what I'm doing. THIS JANUARY. I've been allergic to mirrors my whole life. The cure is my New Years Resolution.

The Mormons invented it. Hallelujah.

-rd

DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB

demonfork wrote:

owenshooter wrote:

Army of GOD wrote:4. Black people are black because they're evil

Blacks were not even considered "HUMAN" until 1978 by the mormon cult. until very recently they were not allowed to be priests in the religion or have any major roles within the faith.-el Jesus negro

1836: In March, Elijah Abel, a black man, is ordained to the office of Elder.
1836: In December, Elijah Abel, is ordained to the office of Seventy.
1844: Walker Lewis, a black man, is ordained to the office of Elder.
1846: William McCary, a black man, is ordained to the office of Elder.
1900: Enoch Abel, the son of Elijah Abel, is ordained to the office of Elder.
1935: Elijah Abel, grandson of Elijah Abel, is ordained to the office of Elder.
1958: All black Melanesians (Fijians) are given the priesthood (blacks in the Philippines even earlier)
1978: Revelation on Priesthood gives the priesthood to all worthy men regardless of color.
1990: Helvecio Martins becomes first black General Authority Seventy.

In fairness, owneshooter... many Christians (particularly in the south) use the Bible to justify their racism. Most members of the Latter Day Saints see the bit about "making white", etc as meaning a spiritual cleansing. Its controversial, sure..and, like I said earlier, I am not a believer in that church. Still, racism is not endemic to the modern church of Latter Day Saints.

notyou2 wrote:

demonfork wrote:

Lootifer wrote:

pimpdave wrote:1. Jesus was really Lucifer's brother in the spirit world, and it was only due to a "heavenly council" vote that Jesus became our redeemer instead of Satan!

Can some mormons (or people who know about this stuff) expand on this? sounds kinda interesting...

In order to expand on this there are many facets of the Mormon gospel that first need to be understood, such as the nature of God and the Mormon belief in the pre-mortal existence.

Ant-mormons like pimpdave love to over simplify concepts like this by throwing out these types of one liners with the goal of trying to manipulate people into believing a false premise through some kind of conjecture.

Pimpdave doesn't really care about the truth. He has an axe to grind with the Mormon faith, for whatever reason, and he will do whatever is necessary to bash the Mormon faith, even if that means being dishonest.

Oh, kinda like how all religions have been spreading lies and half-truths for centuries with the intent to manipulate the masses? Is what PD is doing the same? Yeah, I thought so too.

Are there some people who truly believe everthing pimpdave puts forward? Of course there are! There are also folks who believe the KKK is a true expression of Christianity, who believe that investing and making huge amounts of money is an expression of God's favor for their good beliefs/works; there are Roman Catholics who actually worship idols (or the Pope or Saints) instead of God, etc, etc, etc. [and please note, this is from someone who definitely is not a Mormon, does not agree with a lot of their beliefs!]

BUT... to claim that religions have been spreading lies and half-truths means you blame a few people for using the religion instead of looking at real beliefs..a nd meand you want to blame one group, not simply all of humanity. It is an atheistic game, not reality. The truth is that ALL religions can be distorted, misused. So can any strong belief.. nationalism, creeds & codes (such as chivalry, etc.), etc. Those in power like to distort anything they can to keep their power.. and they usually do so fully convinced themselves that they are "only doing what is right".. or "what is necessary". Its humanity, not religion that is to blame.

16. Mormons believe that the angel Gabriel came down to earth and became Noah in the days of the flood.

This is actually the first thread of PD's that I have enjoyed.

Granted, I understand he's throwing one-liners to bash this religious group. Probably to get at Romney. Still since I really don't care about the religion part it's funny.

jimboston wrote:This is actually the first thread of PD's that I have enjoyed.

Granted, I understand he's throwing one-liners to bash this religious group. Probably to get at Romney. Still since I really don't care about the religion part it's funny.

are you religious?

tolerate all religions or tolerate none. pimpdave is an asshole, but at least he's not a hypocrite about his religion vs. others.

john9blue wrote:

jimboston wrote:This is actually the first thread of PD's that I have enjoyed.

Granted, I understand he's throwing one-liners to bash this religious group. Probably to get at Romney. Still since I really don't care about the religion part it's funny.

are you religious?

tolerate all religions or tolerate none. pimpdave is an asshole, but at least he's not a hypocrite about his religion vs. others.

I am agnostic.

I tolerate all religions and try not to spread my lack of belief unless someone engages me in conversation. I also laugh at all religions equally when they deserve it.

Are you implying I am in some way being hypocritical?

17. Mormons prefer Hamburgers over Cheeseburgers.

Juan_Bottom wrote:17. Mormons prefer Hamburgers over Cheeseburgers.

If that's true, they have that in common with Orthodox Jews.

pimpdave wrote:

Juan_Bottom wrote:17. Mormons prefer Hamburgers over Cheeseburgers.

If that's true, they have that in common with Orthodox Jews.

Me too which is weird because I love me some cheesy beefy burritos.

2dimes wrote:

pimpdave wrote:

Juan_Bottom wrote:17. Mormons prefer Hamburgers over Cheeseburgers.

If that's true, they have that in common with Orthodox Jews.

Me too which is weird because I love me some cheesy beefy burritos.

Not without breaking kosher...

I eat bacon too. In fact I think mormans do too.