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Rules to Live By

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:15 pm
by bedub1
Rules to live by.

The purpose of fighting is to win. There is no possible victory in defense. The sword is more important than the shield, and skill is more important than either. The final weapon is the brain. All else is supplemental.

As John Steinbeck once said:

1. Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.

2. If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.

3. I carry a gun cause a cop is too heavy.

4. When seconds count, the cops are just minutes away.

5. A reporter did a human-interest piece on the Texas Rangers. The reporter recognized the Colt Model 1911 the Ranger was carrying and asked him "Why do you carry a .45?" The Ranger responded, "Because they don't make a .46."

6. An armed man will kill an unarmed man with monotonous regularity.

7. The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented on his wearing his sidearm. "Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you expecting trouble?" "No Ma'am. If I were expecting trouble, I would have brought my rifle."

8. Beware the man who only has one gun. HE PROBABLY KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!!

But wait, there's more!

I was once asked by a lady visiting if I had a gun in the house. I said I did. She said "Well I certainly hope it isn't loaded!" To which I said, of course it is loaded, can't work without bullets!" She then asked, "Are you that afraid of some one evil coming into your house?" My reply was, "No not at all. I am not afraid of the house catching fire either, but I have fire extinguishers around, and they are all loaded too."

Carl Delau,WW II Veteran of the 3d Cavalry and retired Chief of Homicide for the Cleveland Department, "having a gun in the house that isn't loaded is like having a car in the garage without gas in the tank."

"Don't pick a fight with a small weak guy....if he's too easy to beat up he'll probably just double-tap ya."

"A fair fight is a wresting match or a boxing match....any other fight is survival of the fittest; strike to kill."

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:19 pm
by clapper011
:wink: nice post!

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:23 pm
by Guiscard
Why do all your life rules relate to violence?

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:24 pm
by bedub1
Guiscard wrote:Why do all your life rules relate to violence?


Defending yourself is EXTREMELY important....

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:26 pm
by unriggable
bedub1 wrote:
Guiscard wrote:Why do all your life rules relate to violence?


Defending yourself is EXTREMELY important....


Not if you don't have anything to defend yourself from...

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:26 pm
by wicked
too msuch to read!

ruel to live:

1. stay alive!

the end.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:26 pm
by heavycola
bedub1 wrote:
Guiscard wrote:Why do all your life rules relate to violence?


Defending yourself is EXTREMELY important....


against....

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:28 pm
by The1exile
heavycola wrote:
bedub1 wrote:
Guiscard wrote:Why do all your life rules relate to violence?


Defending yourself is EXTREMELY important....


against....


The evil anti ron paul brigade?

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:33 pm
by heavycola
The1exile wrote:
heavycola wrote:
bedub1 wrote:
Guiscard wrote:Why do all your life rules relate to violence?


Defending yourself is EXTREMELY important....


against....


The evil anti ron paul brigade?


hahaha they're already dead. Aaaaaaalready dead.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:36 pm
by Kaplowitz
wicked wrote:too msuch to read!

ruel to live:

1. stay alive!

the end.


rule one: check.

so far so good....

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:38 pm
by clapper011
good rule to live by...
If something in your surrounding doesn't feel right...go with you instinct..it isn't right!

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:40 pm
by wicked
i has lots of me not feel lright now! :lol: swhot todo?

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:45 pm
by heavycola
wicked wrote:swhot todo?


I have absolutely no idea.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:47 pm
by bedub1
If a woman is attacked by a crazy man, I want to hear about how she kicked his nuts into his chest, how she rips his eyes out of their sockets, how she managed to slip a couple fingers into his mouth and "fish hooked" him, tearing his face off his head. I wanna hear how she crushed his trachea, broke his fingers, ripped his scalp off his head, and bit off his ear.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:57 pm
by heavycola
bedub1 wrote:If a woman is attacked by a crazy man, I want to hear about how she kicked his nuts into his chest, how she rips his eyes out of their sockets, how she managed to slip a couple fingers into his mouth and "fish hooked" him, tearing his face off his head. I wanna hear how she crushed his trachea, broke his fingers, ripped his scalp off his head, and bit off his ear.


are you trying to turn me on?

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 4:59 pm
by suggs
"See how your rules spoil the game?" - Mozza.

Exactly. As Jack said, "BOLLOCKS TO THE RULES!"

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 5:34 pm
by Guiscard
suggs wrote:"See how your rules spoil the game?" - Mozza.

Exactly. As Jack said, "BOLLOCKS TO THE RULES!"


Was about to post one of my favourite rules: 'If ever in life you feel like the most miserable person in the world then remember Morrissey exists.'

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 5:35 pm
by suggs
Guiscard wrote:
suggs wrote:"See how your rules spoil the game?" - Mozza.

Exactly. As Jack said, "BOLLOCKS TO THE RULES!"


Was about to post one of my favourite rules: 'If ever in life you feel like the most miserable person in the world then remember Morrissey exists.'


:lol: :lol: :lol: Poor old Moz. Though he hasn't done too badly :lol:

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 5:40 pm
by Gypsys Kiss
If there is no victory in defence, you dont need to defend yourself because you've already lost.....................according to your rules.

And the bloke with the shield can still brain you and defend himself.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 7:30 pm
by Dancing Mustard
bedub1 wrote:If a woman is attacked by a crazy man, I want to hear about how she kicked his nuts into his chest, how she rips his eyes out of their sockets, how she managed to slip a couple fingers into his mouth and "fish hooked" him, tearing his face off his head. I wanna hear how she crushed his trachea, broke his fingers, ripped his scalp off his head, and bit off his ear.
That's some fairly niche porn you're asking us to link you to there...

I'll have to send you it in a PM though or Twill will probably ban me.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 8:26 pm
by muy_thaiguy
3 things.

1. Stay alive.

2. If the woman/women in your life ain't happy, you ain't happy.

3. Pie is good.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 8:44 pm
by MR. Nate
I'm not sure about number one,

Number two seems right, but I'll have to do more research

Three is absolutely correct, beyond a shadow of a doubt.

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:02 am
by apey
Don't touch my pepsi and no one will get hurt and I will stay happy

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:56 am
by SolidLuigi
I heard a good one the other day:

Never trust a man with two first names

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:06 pm
by bedub1
SolidLuigi wrote:I heard a good one the other day:

Never trust a man with two first names


And people that go by all three names are usually lone gunman....John Wilkes Booth, Lee Harvey Oswald