Conquer Club

If i was a medical complaint i'd probably be haemorrhoids, because i'm a bugger to get rid of, I hang around with arseholes, and once i'm finsihed with you, you won't be able to sit down for a week.
What medical complaint would you be and why? And that question goes to number 2.

The title is a bit misleading.

If I was a medical complaint I'd probably be Testicular Cancer, because I'll kill you if you ignore me. (Also, I like balls.)

If I was a medical complaint on a date, I'd be dysentery. I spout so much unnecessary and never-ending shit.

If I was a medical complaint I'd be Insomnia, because you sure as hell aren't sleeping if you are spending the night with me.

Coleman wrote:If I was a medical complaint I'd be Insomnia, because you sure as hell aren't sleeping if you are spending the night with me.

Thanks guys, some good answers there.


next questions:

If i was a mass murderer, my preferred method would be strangulation, because honey, i'm going to take your breath away.
What would your serial killer MO be, and why?

If I was a mass murderer, my preferred method would be vivisection because that's the only way I can get an erection.



Am I doing this right?

If I were a mass murderer, my preferred method would be cutting the heart, since I'm such a heart-breaker after all.

I'd be a pusher, because people fall for me all the time.

muy_thaiguy wrote:The title is a bit misleading.

Guessing you never saw Blind Date then...

Guiscard wrote:

muy_thaiguy wrote:The title is a bit misleading.

Guessing you never saw Blind Date then...

Last time I saw it I was in Junior High (now I'm in my second semester of College).

muy_thaiguy wrote:

Guiscard wrote:

muy_thaiguy wrote:The title is a bit misleading.

Guessing you never saw Blind Date then...

Last time I saw it I was in Junior High (now I'm in my second semester of College).

Answer the question or you're not getting a shag.

heavycola wrote:

muy_thaiguy wrote:

Guiscard wrote:

muy_thaiguy wrote:The title is a bit misleading.

Guessing you never saw Blind Date then...

Last time I saw it I was in Junior High (now I'm in my second semester of College).

Answer the question or you're not getting a shag.

The first one?

muy_thaiguy wrote:

heavycola wrote:

muy_thaiguy wrote:

Guiscard wrote:

muy_thaiguy wrote:The title is a bit misleading.

Guessing you never saw Blind Date then...

Last time I saw it I was in Junior High (now I'm in my second semester of College).

Answer the question or you're not getting a shag.

The first one?

it was a UK TV show, saturday night, guy/girl gets to ask 3 hidden girls/guys 3 questions. Then they go on a date.
/expo
you answer whatever you like mate.



Phew, wow guyz! My gussett is getting quite damp, I can tell you.
Right, last question: The worst piece of advice I ever received was from a high court judge, who said I should get castrated to stop myself murdering cheerleaders. Well it was more of a court order, but still. Anyway it didn't work.
What is the worst advice you have ever received? And that question goes to number 3.

heavycola wrote:What is the worst advice you have ever received? And that question goes to number 3.

Vote Ron Paul.

heavycola wrote:

muy_thaiguy wrote:

heavycola wrote:

muy_thaiguy wrote:

Guiscard wrote:

muy_thaiguy wrote:The title is a bit misleading.

Guessing you never saw Blind Date then...

Last time I saw it I was in Junior High (now I'm in my second semester of College).

Answer the question or you're not getting a shag.

The first one?

it was a UK TV show, saturday night, guy/girl gets to ask 3 hidden girls/guys 3 questions. Then they go on a date.
/expo
you answer whatever you like mate.



Phew, wow guyz! My gussett is getting quite damp, I can tell you.
Right, last question: The worst piece of advice I ever received was from a high court judge, who said I should get castrated to stop myself murdering cheerleaders. Well it was more of a court order, but still. Anyway it didn't work.
What is the worst advice you have ever received? And that question goes to number 3.

That's a bit different from the one we had here in the states.

The worst piece of advice I recieved, build a ship on top of a skyscraper to jump off of it. (Yes, someone actually told me this)

Mentos and Cola are great!

heavycola wrote:What is the worst advice you have ever received? And that question goes to number 3.

girls cant get pregnant if you do it standing up

samholt wrote:

heavycola wrote:What is the worst advice you have ever received? And that question goes to number 3.

girls cant get pregnant if you do it standing up

well thats just gravity, everyone knows that, its science.

heavycola wrote:What is the worst advice you have ever received? And that question goes to number 3.

Back in March last year a friend suggested to me "You should join this online world domination game, it's great! You only have to take one turn every 24 hours, so it won't take up much of your time at all!"

Yeah right!

Thanks for playing. Some of you are Very Strange. But i'm afraid the winner has to be Trippy, as the rest of you are chaps and i'm as straight as an EU-sanctioned banana don't you know.

Trippy - congratulations. But can we not go to the movies this time please.

heavycola wrote:Thanks for playing. Some of you are Very Strange. But i'm afraid the winner has to be Trippy, as the rest of you are chaps and i'm as straight as an EU-sanctioned banana don't you know.

Trippy - congratulations. But can we not go to the movies this time please.

You've got to pick the envelope, mate...

Guiscard wrote:

heavycola wrote:Thanks for playing. Some of you are Very Strange. But i'm afraid the winner has to be Trippy, as the rest of you are chaps and i'm as straight as an EU-sanctioned banana don't you know.

Trippy - congratulations. But can we not go to the movies this time please.

You've got to pick the envelope, mate...

it's another summons.

heavycola wrote:

Guiscard wrote:

heavycola wrote:Thanks for playing. Some of you are Very Strange. But i'm afraid the winner has to be Trippy, as the rest of you are chaps and i'm as straight as an EU-sanctioned banana don't you know.

Trippy - congratulations. But can we not go to the movies this time please.

You've got to pick the envelope, mate...

it's another summons.

No its not... It's a WONDERFUL CARIBBEAN ISLAND-HOPPING TRIP FOR TWO!

Make awkward small talk as you recline under a shady palm in St Lucia! Get drunk and pull the waitress rather then the ugly bitch you picked as you sample the delights of Trinidadian hospitality! Run up a huge room service bill watching porn and drinking miniatures in a luxury Jamaican spa... Then, a days scuba-diving where you can seriously contemplate concocting an accidental malfunction in your fake-tan encrusted date's breathing apparatus. Finally, we'll fly you back first class, where you can enjoy a glass of Champers whilst watching endless episodes of Chris Rock, for a delightfully cringeworthy chat on the sofa of love...

How did you two lovebirds get along?

Guiscard wrote:

heavycola wrote:Thanks for playing. Some of you are Very Strange. But i'm afraid the winner has to be Trippy, as the rest of you are chaps and I'm as straight as an EU-sanctioned banana don't you know.

How did you two lovebirds get along?

Well the setting was perfect - all that sun, sea, and sand, very romantic! Which is more than can be said for my date! He kept mysteriously disappearing for hours at a time and then would come back covered in red ink -at least that's what he said it was. And he would insist on taking his "lucky stun-gun" everywhere with him - (guess he was missing his little farm and just needed something to remind him of back home). Oh and he kept trying to get me to call heads or tails every time he flipped a coin - Lord knows what all that was about!

So anyway, thanks for the date Cilla, but I don't think you'll be needing to buy a new hat just yet.