Is this good? All 3 parts-page 3

[fireedud]

I am doing a social studies project and I have to pretend to be an immigrant to the U.S in the age of immigration. I have to have 3 journal entries (1 in old coutry, 1 in ship, and 1 in America); this is just the first entry. Is it good?

January 17, 1890,
I am thinking of leaving Vienna, Austria. A few gentlemen came over from America and told us about all the oppurtunities there. I can probably get a good job there and make more money. Who knows, I might even be rich. What would have been wrong if I had born into a wealthy family? If I even had just a small fortune, I could do so much more: I could spend more time with my family, I wouldn't have to work so hard, I could even have a few luxuries. But if I go, I would leave all my ffriends and family, and leave my stable job; on the other hand, I could always make friends there, and get a better job there.
I have talked to my family about it, my wife said it would be fine, but my children seem a little reluctant. I have explained to them the money we could get in America, of all the oppurtunities we could get, but they still were reluctant. Well, I hope they've changed their minds by the time I have saved enough money for all of us to take the voyage.

[got tonkaed]

I think you could maybe add a bit about how your worried the life you have in the old country might not be good enough for your family, and be a bit more indecisive about the decision....but its not that bad at all really.

[DaGip]

I am doing a social studies project and I have to pretend to be an immigrant to the U.S in the age of immigration. I have to have 3 journal entries (1 in old coutry, 1 in ship, and 1 in America); this is just the first entry. Is it good?

January 17, 1890,
I am thinking of leaving Vienna, Austria. A few gentlemen came over from America and told us about all the oppurtunities there. I can probably get a good job there and make more money. Who knows, I might even be rich. What would have been wrong if I had born into a wealthy family? If I even had just a small fortune, I could do so much more: I could spend more time with my family, I wouldn't have to work so hard, I could even have a few luxuries. But if I go, I would leave all my ffriends and family, and leave my stable job; on the other hand, I could always make friends there, and get a better job there.
I have talked to my family about it, my wife said it would be fine, but my children seem a little reluctant. I have explained to them the money we could get in America, of all the oppurtunities we could get, but they still were reluctant. Well, I hope they've changed their minds by the time I have saved enough money for all of us to take the voyage.

NO!!!! DON'T LEAVE AUSTRIA!!!

Their money is better than ours! They back their money with something of worth, unlike the United States. The only thing that backs the American dollar is control of oil assetts and a military strong arm! Stay in Austria, please!

[Serbia]

NO!!!! DON'T LEAVE AUSTRIA!!!

Their money is better than ours! They back their money with something of worth, unlike the United States. The only thing that backs the American dollar is control of oil assetts and a military strong arm! Stay in Austria, please!

Yep, sadly, we have loonies here too. We just ignore 'em. Come on in, if that's what you want.

[DaGip]

NO!!!! DON'T LEAVE AUSTRIA!!!

Their money is better than ours! They back their money with something of worth, unlike the United States. The only thing that backs the American dollar is control of oil assetts and a military strong arm! Stay in Austria, please!

Yep, sadly, we have loonies here too. We just ignore 'em. Come on in, if that's what you want.

Yep, that coming from a supporter of the Central Bank that supports pro-Israeli causes all at the expense of the American people. Go get 'em, Tiger! Kill those Iranian devils!

[jnd94]

Well, if you want to make it seem more realistic, you wouldn't say "thinking of leaving Vienna, Austria." Like, if I didn't want to stay in America, I wouldn't say "I'm thinking about leaving Chicago, Illinois."

[fireedud]

NO!!!! DON'T LEAVE AUSTRIA!!!

Their money is better than ours! They back their money with something of worth, unlike the United States. The only thing that backs the American dollar is control of oil assetts and a military strong arm! Stay in Austria, please!

Yep, sadly, we have loonies here too. We just ignore 'em. Come on in, if that's what you want.

GOd so much confusion!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[DaGip]

The Euro is providing much more prosperity for the European people. It is best if you stay in Austria while you watch the corrupt American system self destruct.

[Napoleon Ier]

The Euro is providing much more prosperity for the European people.

You're having a laugh right? the euro is demolishing all our high-tech industry not to mention the disastrous move toward supra-national euro-federast totalitarianism it represents.

Sure, the US of A has its problems, but damn...I love your country, compared to the repugnant dump mine has become

[fireedud]

okay, can you stop hi-jacking this thread?

[Napoleon Ier]

okay, can you stop hi-jacking this thread?

I suppose, if I were to be a harsh critic, I could say you're being far too nonchalant about the issue. Think about the magnitude of what you're considering doing, total uprootal to a completely alien land, involving gruelling travels accross places you probably don't even know exist yet.

[Snorri1234]

The Euro is providing much more prosperity for the European people.

You're having a laugh right? the euro is demolishing all our high-tech industry not to mention the disastrous move toward supra-national euro-federast totalitarianism it represents.

Sure, the US of A has its problems, but damn...I love your country, compared to the repugnant dump mine has become

Well...you live in france.

[Napoleon Ier]

okay, can you stop hi-jacking this thread?

I suppose, if I were to be a harsh critic, I could say you're being far too nonchalant about the issue. Think about the magnitude of what you're considering doing, total uprootal to a completely alien land, involving gruelling travels accross places you probably don't even know exist yet. Your wife wouldn't say "fine honey", the decision is something a lot more, serious, if you will.

[Chris7He]

I am doing a social studies project and I have to pretend to be an immigrant to the U.S in the age of immigration. I have to have 3 journal entries (1 in old coutry, 1 in ship, and 1 in America); this is just the first entry. Is it good?

January 17, 1890,
I am thinking of leaving Vienna, Austria. A few gentlemen came over from America and told us about all the oppurtunities there. I can probably get a good job there and make more money. Who knows, I might even be rich. What would have been wrong if I had born into a wealthy family? If I even had just a small fortune, I could do so much more: I could spend more time with my family, I wouldn't have to work so hard, I could even have a few luxuries. But if I go, I would leave all my ffriends and family, and leave my stable job; on the other hand, I could always make friends there, and get a better job there.
I have talked to my family about it, my wife said it would be fine, but my children seem a little reluctant. I have explained to them the money we could get in America, of all the oppurtunities we could get, but they still were reluctant. Well, I hope they've changed their minds by the time I have saved enough money for all of us to take the voyage.

It's very good! You should exclude the ", Austria" like others said and I don't think people would leave America if it there was opportunity there. I think it should be more of telegrams and letters (depending on what time period). Of course "stable job" is not a REAL job. You need to say, job as a stable boy or something like that. It should include more worrying about what America will actually be like and more worry about leaving the country.

[fireedud]

It's very good! You should exclude the ", Austria" like others said and I don't think people would leave America if it there was opportunity there. I think it should be more of telegrams and letters (depending on what time period). Of course "stable job" is not a REAL job. You need to say, job as a stable boy or something like that. It should include more worrying about what America will actually be like and more worry about leaving the country.

By stable job, I meant a job that is stable, not a stable hand.

[Chris7He]

It's very good! You should exclude the ", Austria" like others said and I don't think people would leave America if it there was opportunity there. I think it should be more of telegrams and letters (depending on what time period). Of course "stable job" is not a REAL job. You need to say, job as a stable boy or something like that. It should include more worrying about what America will actually be like and more worry about leaving the country.

By stable job, I meant a job that is stable, not a stable hand.

Whoops, sorry. You might want to elaborate on "stable job".

[Frigidus]

Of course "stable job" is not a REAL job. You need to say, job as a stable boy or something like that.

Wh...wha...oh, sweet...<swallows a handful of pills>

OK...yah, better. Wow.

[DaGip]

It's very good! You should exclude the ", Austria" like others said and I don't think people would leave America if it there was opportunity there. I think it should be more of telegrams and letters (depending on what time period). Of course "stable job" is not a REAL job. You need to say, job as a stable boy or something like that. It should include more worrying about what America will actually be like and more worry about leaving the country.

By stable job, I meant a job that is stable, not a stable hand.

I think you should kill somebody in Austria and stow away on a ship inside a barrel heading for New York!

[fireedud]

My revised version:

January 17, 1890,
I am thinking of leaving Vienna, Austria. A few gentlemen came over from America and told us about all the oppurtunities there. I can probably get a good job there and make more money. Who knows, I might even be rich. What would have been wrong if I had born into a wealthy family? If I even had just a small fortune, I could do so much more: I could spend more time with my family, I wouldn't have to work so hard, I could even have a few luxuries. I'll be able to provide for family more: somedays all we can afford is Rindsuppe (beef soup)or Tafelspitz (boiled beef). But if I go, I would leave all my friends and family and everything I know; I will be going to an unfamiliar place without any idea of what I am doing; I don't even speak the same language! I just hope these people were telling the truth. Unforutately, the only way to find out is to take the risk, but if they were telling the truth, I could be rich, like a king!
I have talked to my family about it, my wife said I should do what I feel is best for the kids., but my children seem a little reluctant. I have explained to them the money we could get in America, of all the oppurtunities we could get there, but they still were reluctant. I feel it will be best for them to go there. Well, I hope they've changed their minds by the time I have saved enough money for all of us to take the voyage, so we can at least have a pleasant trip.

[jnd94]

Well, if you want to make it seem more realistic, you wouldn't say "thinking of leaving Vienna, Austria." Like, if I didn't want to stay in America, I wouldn't say "I'm thinking about leaving Chicago, Illinois."

didn't see my response?

[fireedud]

Well, if you want to make it seem more realistic, you wouldn't say "thinking of leaving Vienna, Austria." Like, if I didn't want to stay in America, I wouldn't say "I'm thinking about leaving Chicago, Illinois."

didn't see my response?

It has to be a little unrealistic for people to understand; we have to give this orally as well, and not everybody knows where Vienna is.

[Iliad]

Does it have to be Austria? You can choose a country with
a) war
b) civil unrest
c) great pollution
d) somehow other bad living conditions

[muy_thaiguy]

Does it have to be Austria? You can choose a country with
a) war
b) civil unrest
c) great pollution
d) somehow other bad living conditions

Russia? If I remember correctly, it wasn't exactly the best place at the time.

[DaGip]

Does it have to be Austria? You can choose a country with
a) war
b) civil unrest
c) great pollution
d) somehow other bad living conditions

Russia? If I remember correctly, it wasn't exactly the best place at the time.

How about a Jew from Germany? They were flocking here like locusts back in the day.

[fireedud]

Does it have to be Austria? You can choose a country with
a) war
b) civil unrest
c) great pollution
d) somehow other bad living conditions

I could, but it'll take too much time, I only have 1 entry, it's due monday, and I'll be gone haplf the day tommorrow.