Conquer Club

sack of assholes.

1. Jack Black called Kayne West "talented". The only people who think that asshole Kayne is talented are other assholes.

2. Jack Black wanted Meryl Streep to win an Oscar not because of her acting performance, but because she talked shit about Trump. Only an asshole would award an Oscar to someone not based on acting ability.

3. Check out this kid-


What an asshole. You guessed it, that's Jack Black at 13 years old appearing in a Pitfall video game for the Atari 2600. What an asshole.

4. At the age of 14 Jack Black had a cocaine addiction. What kind of an asshole gets addicted to cocaine at 14 years old? I guess all that fame from the Pitfall commercial went straight to his head...err...nose. What an asshole.

5. In 2015 Jack Black went to Uganda for a comic benefit. Only and asshole thinks telling jokes will help stop a genocidal campaign. What an asshole.

6. Jack Black wrote a song, "The Government sucks" with his band Tenacious D. On Trump's Inauguration they played that song. Jack Black stated that "We haven't played this song for years because it never felt appropriate". The real reason they never played it was because they didn't wanna get called "racists" for playing a song called "The Government sucks" while Obama was in office. I can assure Jack Black that the government sucked even under Obama. Jack Black is an asshole because he only went after the low hanging fruit that is Trump and pussied out in the face of Obama. Jack's a pussified asshole.

7. In 2010 Jack Black appeared in an adaptation of Gulliver's Travels. It was terrible. It was worse than terrible. It takes a real asshole to f*ck up Gulliver's Travels.

8. Jack Black appeared in a movie call "Sex Tape". It was a terrible movie, but that's not why Jack Black is an asshole. In the movie Black's role was the owner of YouPorn. It takes a real asshole to pretend to be someone cool.


9. King Kong died because of Jack Black's greed. This level of assholeness drives me into a murderous rage every time I think about it. What a fucking asshole. Even worse, when King Kong is laying there, dead, Jack Black has the nerve to say "Twas beauty that killed the beast" and walk away!! What the ever assholing f*ck is that shite? Not only was what he said just stupid, he just walked away. All those people killed, so he could make a buck. He walks away. He got King Kong killed but does he even try to do the right thing? Like take responsibility not just for Kong's death but for all those other asshole people dying? At the very least Jack Black could have at least taken Kong's body back to Skull Island and buried the dumb gorilla with the rest of it's dead family. Jack Black is truly and asshole of the nth degree.

10.

Jack Black has the nerve to say this to someone else when it should be someone saying those very words to Jack Black. Jack Black, projecting is for assholes.

he was pure gold in Nacho Libre, tho & to a lesser extent, in High Fidelity.

riskllama wrote:he was pure gold in Nacho Libre, tho & to a lesser extent, in High Fidelity.

I knew there was a reason I didn't mention those. Good catch llama! You're a regular Cap'n Obvious kinda guy ain't ya? Keep up the good work.

what was your reason, patches?

riskllama wrote:what was your reason, patches?

I promised what's his name.

no silly, what was the reason you failed to mention Nacho & HF?

i have to say i never liked him and never understood how someone could like him. but not because of your reasons above.
He just makes me feel uncomfortable and i find him very unfunny

riskllama wrote:no silly, what was the reason you failed to mention Nacho & HF?

Well, I seriously thought about including Nacho in the list, being as Jack Black was culturally appropriating and pretending to be Mexican, but one can't be an asshole simply by making fun of Mexican stereotypes. Not to mention Black's purpose in the movie was to try and help a bunch of poor hungry orphans. Only an asshole would call someone doing that an asshole. So I had to scratch Nacho.

As for HF, I've never seen it. Apparently it's a romantic/drama comedy. I'm sorry, but I don't think I can stand to see Jack Black in a romcom. So yeah, he's probably an asshole in that movie, I wouldn't doubt it, but since I can't specifically confirm that, I had to leave it off the list.

How that answers your questions sir!

Mars Attacks is a great movie! Jack Black gets himself vaporized trying to play the hero. That's awesome! It was the perfect role for our dear Jack Black. I certainly couldn't put that on the list!

Good post Jones.

I like Jack Black. He was hilarious in Jumanji.

Yeah but Jack Black did that song "f*ck her Gently" which is one of the best songs of this generation. So, I mean, c'mon.

He's the only person to suck Harvey Weinstein cock without the offer of a role on the table