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Sorry Daughter, You are ugly.

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Sorry Daughter, You are ugly.

Postby dustn64 on Mon Mar 10, 2008 4:45 pm

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Postby qazwsx12345 on Mon Mar 10, 2008 5:04 pm

there is something wrong and mean about that... can u believe parents these days??
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Postby Ditocoaf on Mon Mar 10, 2008 5:08 pm

"these days"? Hell, its not like society wasn't like this 80 years ago, 100 years ago, or 200 years ago. There wasn't cosmetic surgery until recently, but if there had been, you'd bet parents would have been pressuring their children (mainly daughters) into it.

There were never any "good old days." That's what I have to contribute to the thread.
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Postby brooksieb on Mon Mar 10, 2008 5:14 pm

"Why should it be any different for a Downs child?"

and this brings me on to,

why should it be any different for a downs child, people should be accepted as they are, that's how god and their mum and dad made them
Last edited by brooksieb on Mon Mar 10, 2008 5:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby jnd94 on Mon Mar 10, 2008 5:32 pm

wtf is wrong with them

Those parents are shallow and sub-consious. Everyone finds their crowd eventually, you don't need cosmetic surgery to help fit in.
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Postby brooksieb on Mon Mar 10, 2008 5:34 pm

jnd94 wrote:wtf is wrong with them

Those parents are shallow and sub-consious. Everyone finds their crowd eventually, you don't need cosmetic surgery to help fit in.


Exactly! theres loads of children and adults with downs or similar disabilities, just fit in with them or overcome problems challenges to fit in with other types of people
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Postby mandalorian2298 on Mon Mar 10, 2008 5:56 pm

Bussey said she and her husband David were motivated by love for their child and deliberated for a year before putting her through the ordeal.


If they are truely motivated with the love for their child, then they should give her up to someone who is ready to raise her. They clearly aren't since they 'humanly' decided to change her into a more 'parent friendly' model. :sick: I hope that both the parents and whichever surgeon performed this unnecessary cosmetic surgery on the minor will be put behind the bars for child abuse. :evil: The kid will certainly be better off without them in her life.
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Postby MeDeFe on Mon Mar 10, 2008 7:49 pm

While surgery on children can be okay, if they have some affliction threatening their life or future health, say, in his case she was operated on for the sole reason that she didn't look like other kids. I don't think parents have the right to make a decision like that for their child who isn't capable of understanding what's going on, Down syndrome or not. I have more sympathy for the other couple mentioned in the article, at least they say they are going to wait until their child is 18 years old before reaching a decision, by that time it's not improbable that they will be able to explain the situation and their daughter can give her own opinion on the matter.
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Postby Iliad on Tue Mar 11, 2008 1:43 am

What great parents :roll:
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Postby GabonX on Tue Mar 11, 2008 2:18 am

Keep in mind that they are doing this to try to give their child a better life. If you have ever looked at an ugly person and thought "hey, they're pretty ugly" you are part of why these parents did this. You may disagree with the parents choice here but they ARE doing it for the benifite of the child...

What's the difference between this and giving a child braces who doesn't want them? In most cases braces are not needed for any medical reason and they are extremely painful. I guess we should condem these parents as well.
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Postby got tonkaed on Tue Mar 11, 2008 4:42 am

GabonX wrote:Keep in mind that they are doing this to try to give their child a better life. If you have ever looked at an ugly person and thought "hey, they're pretty ugly" you are part of why these parents did this. You may disagree with the parents choice here but they ARE doing it for the benifite of the child...

What's the difference between this and giving a child braces who doesn't want them? In most cases braces are not needed for any medical reason and they are extremely painful. I guess we should condem these parents as well.


personally i think theres a bit of a difference when you are talking about a child with Downs who is far less to have as much of a need for cosmetic surgery (given they likely wont concieve of as developed a body image) as opposed to the kid who wont want braces, because they think they could look silly.
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Postby GabonX on Tue Mar 11, 2008 7:26 am

So according to you it is better to make a child who cares about their image look worse than to make a child who does not care about their image look better.

This is the logic as you have presented it.
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Postby got tonkaed on Tue Mar 11, 2008 7:31 am

GabonX wrote:So according to you it is better to make a child who cares about their image look worse than to make a child who does not care about their image look better.

This is the logic as you have presented it.


i believe what i was trying to say is, its more understanding of a parent to do something in the short term which may be against what the child wants in order to have a positive long term impact (like teeth with braces) for a child who can concieve more of a body image than it is for parents to be concerned about short term improvements for a child who is less likely to do so.

I think youve missed the point.
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Postby heavycola on Tue Mar 11, 2008 9:13 am

GabonX wrote:Keep in mind that they are doing this to try to give their child a better life. If you have ever looked at an ugly person and thought "hey, they're pretty ugly" you are part of why these parents did this. You may disagree with the parents choice here but they ARE doing it for the benifite of the child...

What's the difference between this and giving a child braces who doesn't want them? In most cases braces are not needed for any medical reason and they are extremely painful. I guess we should condem these parents as well.


They are not doing this for their kid, they are doing this for themselves. That seems fairly obvious.
I don't have any ugly friends and I am guessing not many people here do - nto because all our friends are conventionally beautiful, but because as soon as you get to know someone, even a little bit, their looks stop mattering. Downs kids are, in my limteed experience, a generally friendly and happy bunch. This kid will be fine - it's her parents' WASP-ish embarrassment that is the issue here.
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Postby btownmeggy on Tue Mar 11, 2008 10:37 am

got tonkaed wrote:... to the kid who wont want braces, because they think they could look silly.


What kid doesn't want braces?

They're the coolest thing to hit Junior High.

I got braces in 4th grade and my prestige immediately shot through the roof.
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Postby Floppie on Tue Mar 11, 2008 11:06 am

heavycola wrote:They are not doing this for their kid, they are doing this for themselves. That seems fairly obvious.
I don't have any ugly friends and I am guessing not many people here do - nto because all our friends are conventionally beautiful, but because as soon as you get to know someone, even a little bit, their looks stop mattering. Downs kids are, in my limteed experience, a generally friendly and happy bunch. This kid will be fine - it's her parents' WASP-ish embarrassment that is the issue here.


I think what they want to avoid is the instant recognition of Down's traits and the automatic assumptions that come with it. A noble goal, but they're awfully naive if they really think that a bit of cosmetic surgery will hide their child's difference from anything more than a passing glance. The moment someone interacts with that child, they'll know they're different.

Being a parent, I tend to give parents the benefit of the doubt when they say they are doing something for the benefit of their child. More often than not, they honestly believe that. In this case, I fear they're very mistaken...it's possible that the "more normal" look could result in people having less patience and more hostility toward the child; the Down's look protects them from some of that because people KNOW what they're dealing with before they're even within speaking distance.
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Postby heavycola on Tue Mar 11, 2008 11:27 am

Floppie wrote:
heavycola wrote:They are not doing this for their kid, they are doing this for themselves. That seems fairly obvious.
I don't have any ugly friends and I am guessing not many people here do - nto because all our friends are conventionally beautiful, but because as soon as you get to know someone, even a little bit, their looks stop mattering. Downs kids are, in my limteed experience, a generally friendly and happy bunch. This kid will be fine - it's her parents' WASP-ish embarrassment that is the issue here.


I think what they want to avoid is the instant recognition of Down's traits and the automatic assumptions that come with it. A noble goal, but they're awfully naive if they really think that a bit of cosmetic surgery will hide their child's difference from anything more than a passing glance. The moment someone interacts with that child, they'll know they're different.

Being a parent, I tend to give parents the benefit of the doubt when they say they are doing something for the benefit of their child. More often than not, they honestly believe that. In this case, I fear they're very mistaken...it's possible that the "more normal" look could result in people having less patience and more hostility toward the child; the Down's look protects them from some of that because people KNOW what they're dealing with before they're even within speaking distance.


AYe, right enough. It's a big assumption I guess. All i have doen is read a daily mail story FFS :) But inyernet assumptions are fun and easy to make.
Not sure about automatic assumptions re: down's syndrome though - that the kid has learnign difficulties? Or a lowered mental age? Pretty well-founded assumptions, i think. Which is why I think you're right about their naivety - if they have done this for the kid, they are fooling themselves. Which is why i reckon it's really about them, too.
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Postby Floppie on Tue Mar 11, 2008 11:48 am

heavycola wrote:AYe, right enough. It's a big assumption I guess. All i have doen is read a daily mail story FFS :) But inyernet assumptions are fun and easy to make.
Not sure about automatic assumptions re: down's syndrome though - that the kid has learnign difficulties? Or a lowered mental age? Pretty well-founded assumptions, i think. Which is why I think you're right about their naivety - if they have done this for the kid, they are fooling themselves. Which is why i reckon it's really about them, too.


The error in judgement comes from two assumptions:

1) All people should be treated as "normal"

2) We can fix anything

Number one is responsible for most every absurd program and policy that exists in public schools today. The notion that every kid should be able to "be normal" when in fact, there are some kids who simply AREN'T like other kids. I'll stop now before I get off on a rant about things that happen in schools :)

Number two is pure pride. We think that there is something we can do to make anything we want to happen, happen.
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