Why can't I be a good sport

[HighlanderAttack]

When inflicted with bad dice or the opposite, fantastic dice by an opponent, it really pisses me off. Why must I still act like an immature child bad sport?

Honestly, I am truly competitive, but in real life I do not act like a child anymore when I lose in a game or sports--I can hold back the anguish.

On CC however, I show my true immaturity when losing.

I don't even really try and work on being a good sport.

I am now under ten games active and even play meaningless public games-I still get pissed.

How many of you have this same issue?

[TheGeneral2112]

When inflicted with bad dice or the opposite, fantastic dice by an opponent, it really pisses me off. Why must I still act like an immature child bad sport?

Honestly, I am truly competitive, but in real life I do not act like a child anymore when I lose in a game or sports--I can hold back the anguish.

On CC however, I show my true immaturity when losing.

I don't even really try and work on being a good sport.

I am now under ten games active and even play meaningless public games-I still get pissed.

How many of you have this same issue?

*Raises hand*

[natty dread]

I sometimes curse the dice if I have bad luck (who doesn't) but I never take it on the other players...

I think it's just poor form to throw tantrums in chat, the other players aren't responsible for your bad luck and/or poor strategic decisions.

The good news is you're recognizing the negative traits in your behaviour instead of denying them, and this enables you to work on them. Since you recognize that your behaviour is immature (in your own words), do you have any idea what might cause you to behave this way? Do you think a lack of real social feedback might contribute to it, as in you're not face-to-face with your friends and don't have to face the embarrasment of showing your frustration/anger/etc to your friends, which enables you to more openly express your frustration in an online setting? It's common knowledge that people often act less restrained - in both good and bad ways - online, and the fact that it's hard to connect emotionally with other people when your communication is reduced to words on a screen.

Therefore, could it be possible that you might be able to work on your behaviour by trying to visualize your opponents in the game as persons who are sitting next to you, and trying to consider everything you write as if you were saying it to their face? This is of course harder in public games with random opponents, but it could be worth a shot... if you don't know your opponents, just make up a mental image of some random person... this way, you could sort of "re-humanize" your view of the people you're playing against, in a way seeing them more as people rather than just names on a screen, and thus making you less likely to lash out at them when you have bad luck.

[HighlanderAttack]

I sometimes curse the dice if I have bad luck (who doesn't) but I never take it on the other players...

I think it's just poor form to throw tantrums in chat, the other players aren't responsible for your bad luck and/or poor strategic decisions.

The good news is you're recognizing the negative traits in your behaviour instead of denying them, and this enables you to work on them. Since you recognize that your behaviour is immature (in your own words), do you have any idea what might cause you to behave this way? Do you think a lack of real social feedback might contribute to it, as in you're not face-to-face with your friends and don't have to face the embarrasment of showing your frustration/anger/etc to your friends, which enables you to more openly express your frustration in an online setting? It's common knowledge that people often act less restrained - in both good and bad ways - online, and the fact that it's hard to connect emotionally with other people when your communication is reduced to words on a screen.

Therefore, could it be possible that you might be able to work on your behaviour by trying to visualize your opponents in the game as persons who are sitting next to you, and trying to consider everything you write as if you were saying it to their face? This is of course harder in public games with random opponents, but it could be worth a shot... if you don't know your opponents, just make up a mental image of some random person... this way, you could sort of "re-humanize" your view of the people you're playing against, in a way seeing them more as people rather than just names on a screen, and thus making you less likely to lash out at them when you have bad luck.

PSY 101 for sure

[TheGeneral2112]

I sometimes curse the dice if I have bad luck (who doesn't) but I never take it on the other players...

I think it's just poor form to throw tantrums in chat, the other players aren't responsible for your bad luck and/or poor strategic decisions.

The good news is you're recognizing the negative traits in your behaviour instead of denying them, and this enables you to work on them. Since you recognize that your behaviour is immature (in your own words), do you have any idea what might cause you to behave this way? Do you think a lack of real social feedback might contribute to it, as in you're not face-to-face with your friends and don't have to face the embarrasment of showing your frustration/anger/etc to your friends, which enables you to more openly express your frustration in an online setting? It's common knowledge that people often act less restrained - in both good and bad ways - online, and the fact that it's hard to connect emotionally with other people when your communication is reduced to words on a screen.

Therefore, could it be possible that you might be able to work on your behaviour by trying to visualize your opponents in the game as persons who are sitting next to you, and trying to consider everything you write as if you were saying it to their face? This is of course harder in public games with random opponents, but it could be worth a shot... if you don't know your opponents, just make up a mental image of some random person... this way, you could sort of "re-humanize" your view of the people you're playing against, in a way seeing them more as people rather than just names on a screen, and thus making you less likely to lash out at them when you have bad luck.

PSY 101 for sure

We aren't talking about strategic mistakes, we are talking about the shitty fucking dice. Like in my last game against GeneralRisk I lost both a 12v6 and a 10v1. Utterly bullshit. No way that can be blamed on strategy. Or, I just played a Maximus game where we both used the same strategy. The other guy won. Why? Dice. Something that I can't help. Pisses me off...

[Fruitcake]

We aren't talking about strategic mistakes, we are talking about the shitty fucking dice. Like in my last game against GeneralRisk I lost both a 12v6 and a 10v1. Utterly bullshit. No way that can be blamed on strategy. Or, I just played a Maximus game where we both used the same strategy. The other guy won. Why? Dice. Something that I can't help. Pisses me off...

If I could sit in front of you now, put my suitably sympathetic and empathetic face on, listen to your anguish and your sadness, I would, for I would have to respond, in a sympathetic, empathetic way you understand

"Some people are just losers. They have to be so some of us can be winners."

[natty dread]

We aren't talking about strategic mistakes, we are talking about the shitty fucking dice. Like in my last game against GeneralRisk I lost both a 12v6 and a 10v1. Utterly bullshit. No way that can be blamed on strategy. Or, I just played a Maximus game where we both used the same strategy. The other guy won. Why? Dice. Something that I can't help. Pisses me off...

Well firstly, as you perhaps don't recall, I said "bad luck and/or poor strategy". And/or means "either or both". It's basically a logical OR operation, ie. 1 || 0, 0 || 1 and 1 || 1 all result in 1.

Secondly, perhaps you aren't really angry at the dice per se - perhaps you are angry because you feel that you are not in control, that events that you can't control affect the outcome, which makes you feel powerless. Perhaps you feel that you have so little control of your life in general, that when you see this lack of control manifest in a concrete phenomenon, ie. the dice, it gives you a convenient target to take out your anger and frustration on?

It's a common problem, and one that doesn't have any easy solutions - the best I can suggest is to simply try to accept the fact that you can't always change the things you'd want to change, and try to find happiness in the kind of life you are capable of having. Of course this doesn't mean that you should be satisfied with whatever happens to you, nor does it mean that you should give up on trying to change your life for the better - you should never give up on that, but perhaps you should prioritize and pick your battles. Try to change what you can, but don't worry too much if you can't change everything.

[Fruitcake]

Secondly, perhaps you aren't really angry at the dice per se - perhaps you are angry because you are not in control, that events that you can't control affect the outcome because you are a loser, which makes you feel powerless as it does all losers. Perhaps you feel that you have so little control of your life in general because you are a loser, that when you see this lack of control manifest in a concrete phenomenon, ie. the dice, it gives you a convenient target to take out your anger and frustration on?

It's a common problem amongst those who are losers like you, and one that doesn't have any easy solutions, except perhaps putting a bullet through your head, but don't do that, there is always a need for cannon fodder - alternatively, the best I can suggest is to simply try to accept the fact that you are a loser and will never change the things you'd want to change, and try to find happiness in being a loser. Of course this doesn't mean that you should be satisfied with whatever happens to you, nor does it mean that you should give up on trying to change your life for the better...it wont, because you are a loser, pure and simple, but do carry on, it provides much mirth and amusement for us winners - you should never give up on that, after all, we winners need amusing but perhaps you should prioritize and pick your battles, maybe take on other losers. Try to change what you can, which is pretty much nothing, but don't worry too much if you can't change everything....well in your case anything but let's not talk semantics.

[shieldgenerator7]

I didn't see natty's post that way.... but it is "funny" (as in strange)

I do have a high respect for you HA and this does little to deter it. In fact I might even respect you more for being able to admit it.

And I do completely understand. I don't explode ful out but sometimes I post something like "crash got really bad dice, lost a 9 stack to your one. your defensive troops are really strong". It's along the same lines of venting frustration but (IMO) toned down.

Also maybe if you want to vent open Word or Notepad and type your heart out there, and then type 'gg' to your opponent. This way you can still vent without others seeing you vent. That is, if showing heated frustration to others is the problem.

With you all the way

-SG7 ( )

[Paddy The Cat]

i always bitch out the dice when they suck, and thank them in chat when they hand me a game and admit to my opponent i only won due to luck.

however, if my opponent makes a boneheaded play/suicides/a deadbeater ruins the game, those are the only times i really lose it on another player. ill call them some horrible name or something. i always fell bad afterwards and sometimes if i remember i apologize. although sometimes this causes the other player to start insulting me, in which cse things escalate quickly.

either way i know where youre coming from HA, i never would call someone a shit player at a game in RL, no matter how bad